Let's talk about clothes

I bought my gym clothes to work with me so I wouldn’t have to stop home before going there. I left them in the car. I’ve been complaining lately that I’m sweating like a pig at the gym but I don’t think that will happen today. At least not as early as usual. I mean.. it’s frickin’ FREEZING outside. My car windows have been frozen shut, which makes it very difficult to swipe my card to get in and out of the parking garage. But anyway, so.. my clothes are absolutely frigid and if it weren’t so darn cold outside, I’d trek to the parking garage and bring them in. But it’s way too cold for that crap. At least it’ll take a good 15 minutes before I look like a drowned rat, as opposed to the regular 2 minutes.

Speaking of clothes, I’ll first regale you with my Worst Dressed list from the Golden Globes (and why they made the list):

Cameron Diaz - Sweetie.. you’re a blonde.. not a brunette. And that floofy thing you tried to pass off as couture? No wonder Justin dumped your ass.

Salma Hayek - The dress wasn’t so bad, but the shoes she paired with it? They were heinous. It looked like she got them at Contempo Casuals.... Three years ago. I could swear the heels were cork. Oh Salma... you have the money.. spend it! Delicate shoes… that’s what the Golden Globes are about.

Meryl Streep - Just because you are an institution, doesn’t mean you have to look like one. She should have consulted Helen Mirren on how to dress your age, and still look beautiful.

Renee Zellweger - I didn’t not like her dress. I just wanted to know if anyone has ever seen her eyes, because in every picture I see, there are only two slits where her eyes should be. That and when she came on stage it looked like she was wearing her mother’s heels.

Vanessa Williams - Do I need to say it? Such a beautiful woman… such ugly hair.

Patricia Arquette - You’re well endowed. We get it. Move on. And wherever you move to, make sure it's FAR away from leather.

Beyonce - Oh honey no. I know you’re a newbie but the Golden Globes is not a party where everyone wears gold. It must hurt to try THAT hard.

Angelina Jolie - I didn’t not like her dress. I just hated that she looked like she wanted to rip everyone’s heart out of their chest during the whole red carpet. I mean… this is Hollywood and red carpets are the thing to do. At least pretend to like it. You’re an actress for Christ’s sake.

Rinko Kikuchi - Much like Bjork’s swan number, it will always be remembered… but not for good.. only evil. At least Babel won Best Picture. That takes a load off.