Sometimes I Loathe Modern Technology

The DVR has yet to work. I’m far from happy. It was all set. We checked it! But when we came home and checked to be sure Heroes had taped…… NOTHING. We then tried to tape something again and it said we had 0% of our recording space left. Which is funny, because when we go to set things up it says we have 0% of our recording space full. I’m frustrated and won’t be home tomorrow night so it needs to get fixed STAT! I can’t miss Project Runway and America’s Next Top Model. I’m sorry, I just can’t. Not because of some technological glitch that should NOT be not working! So, if anyone has a clue as to how the DVR for Mid-Hudson Cablevision works, please let me know as soon as possible. I need to fix this problem (or get someone else to fix it for me) in the insanely near future. I sure do hope Tre calls someone. I wish I could mental telepathy her but we’re not “those” kind of twins.

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned what my Halloween costume is going to be, but I decided I’m going to be a brownie. Not the edible kind (unless you’re a certain someone of the opposite sex), the girl scout kind. My mom even thinks she has my old sash and beanie in the attic. How freaking funny would that be? So, really all I need is a white blouse, khaki skirt and brown knee socks. I am so gonna rock the knee socks. I wish I could find those cute little orange things that attached to your socks. I don’t’ know what they’re called…. maybe they were considered garters, I have no clue. But, J. and I need to go to Boscov’s tomorrow night and they have Brownie stuff so I’ll have to see if I can find something. If not, I’ll have to find some stuff online. When I walked into work this morning I was greeted by Lacey and Petra, our receptionist. Halloween is a HUGE deal in my office so we had been trying to come up with some sort of trio that we could be. Well, they had decided this morning (thanks to a wacky wig they found as a muse) that the three of us were going to be TLC, but someone would have to look dead since only two of the three are alive. Yep… they were serious. After trying to get me to be characters from Labyrinth (I think Lacey really just wanted to be David Bowie) they finally settled on Napoleon Dynamite. To the left is the picture they sent me to tell me and my response was: “I guess I’m Pedro.” Petra is tall with very curly hair so she’d have to be Napoleon. Lacey will kill the side ponytail and fanny pack so she has to be Deb. I own a pair of cowboy boots so I have to be Pedro. I’m so sick of not being cute for Halloween. I mean, really! But, I will do the best I can with it. All I really need is a bolo tie, a western shirt and a kick ass wig. If anyone has anything of the sort, let me know.. Oh yeah.. I also need a porn star mustache. My sister let me know that I am NOT (contrary to popular belief) a good looking man, so this costume should be extremely interesting. Not to worry, I’ll take pictures.

I need an oil change. The date I’m supposed to be due back is November 11th. Obviously, I drive too much so my car usually needs to go in much sooner. I’m already overdue mileage wise. However, the last time I went to the Jiffy Lube (took my car in myself like a big girl), I ended up paying about $50 for an oil change. Apparently, that’s too much, or at least that’s what everyone has told me. Yep, I’m THAT girl that knows nothing about cars (and computers, and cooking - the three C’s basically) and always gets taken for a ride, and not the good ride! So, I’m trying to use my feminine wiles to get J. to take my car in. He goes to some place where he gets it for like $20-$25 and I would so be down with that. He said he’d go with me on Saturday if he doesn’t have to help his brother move (which I know he will) so I’m going to try to guilt him into taking it in for me. Unfortunately, guilt does not really work on him so I’m going to have to come up with a better idea.

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I had to sub for my father in his bowling league last night. That was a train wreck. I couldn’t have sucked more if I were a two dollar hooker needing a crack fix. It was excruciating. I dumped the ball in the gutter twice (something I NEVER do) and missed all seven 10-pins that I left. Granted, as a right handed bowler, 10 pins are probably the most difficult spare that isn’t a split. However, you shouldn’t miss ALL SEVEN that you left. I mean, odds are you’ll at least pick up one. I just hate going into that league and stinking it up! Granted, it’s early in the season but I really shouldn’t suck that bad. I was pretty disappointed and then to come home and have there be no “Heroes?” You can imagine the obscenities that were hurled.

I’m supposed to be going to see Hollywoodland tonight so it looks like I’ll be missing Dancing with the Stars. Hopefully Springer stinks up the joint and finally gets booted. Play it safe this week, boys. No one likes the cocky kid on the playground and it’d be a travesty to be kicked off before Jerry Springer and the chick whose name no one knows just cause you wanted to make a splash!

Anyway, hopefully Tre (the electronics genius that she is) will figure out what we’re doing wrong with the DVR so we can tape Nip/Tuck and watch SVU. I will sacrifice something to the electronic Gods if you just let me tape my damn shows!!!!!!!!!!!! Come on.. I’m a relatively nice girl who only wishes harm on those who wish harm on me. Just let a sister see Julian McMahon’s ass in slo-mo. That’s all I can ask for..

Tomorrow is hump day. Act accordingly.