The weekend is never long enough

Where do I begin? No ball games, so instead Friday night was a bit of a drunken blur which is funny because I literally had no intention of even being out. I think I may have had a fever. However, some friends of ours came down to go out so I figured I’d better make an appearance. 14 beers, three shots and some red wine on my sister’s white pants later, we figured it was time to go home! I went straight to bed (as I have a tendency to do) and was rudely woken up at 8:30 by my sister, who told me that not only did the red wine come out of her pants, but she also left her cell phone in her pocket, making it the cleanest (yet non-working) cell phone on the planet. Believe it or not, it’s starting to work but the ringer sounds like… well… it defies description. Anyway, I finally rolled out of bed around 11:30 and was quickly distracted by the movie “Hackers” with Angelina Jolie and Jonny Lee Miller. I LOVE that movie and for some reason don’t own it, therefore I felt it only right to take the opportunity to watch it on TV. My mother felt differently (have I mentioned that our move in date can’t come quick enough?) so after a healthy round of grease, I showered and the shopping began. I was able to get everything I needed for the bathroom, not to mention my bedside table so things are moving along. Slowly but surely.

Saturday night I went to see The Lipstick Lovelies, a burlesque show that some of the girls I used to dance with perform in. It was interesting. I’ll be honest. I wasn’t quite sure what burlesque entailed and it was raunchier than I expected but I had a great time. It was really funny and entertaining, that’s for sure. It was nice to see a few bigger girls in the show that were still funny and sexy. However, if I ever performed in the show I really don’t think I would urge my parents to go. There are just some things you don’t want to hear coming from your daughter’s mouth, whether it’s true or not! Sunday was Track Day! We had an awesome time (see picture). I actually won the first race and was up $30 most of the day, but as time wore on we started making some random bets that didn’t really pan out. In all honesty, I pick the horses that have the prettiest names so it’s all a game of chance to me. I ended up being the driver and (take this advice) I highly recommend you don’t take three drunk people to Applebee’s. It’s just not a fun situation to be in. Funny? Yes. Fun for the sober person? Not so much. Regardless, we had a really great time and I think that even after dinner, I ended up being down only $4.00. What can I say? The colors and jockey names treated me well.

The O’s are losing 9-4 but we still have Miggy! Thank god for small favors. Ok, that’s probably a big favor cause I was pretty sure something was gonna happen before the trade deadline. Luckily, it was just talk. It sounds like Tejada really does want to stay in Baltimore and maybe his notoriety can be used to bring some pure talent in next year. I guess we’ll have to wait and see what happens. Regardless, it’s going to be a very long (and hopefully eventful) offseason!

I wasn’t really around all weekend so I don’t have any television news. I’m watching Fresh Meat now, but it’s only just begun so I’m afraid I can’t rant about my hatred of Wes and other such entertaining tidbits. Unfortunately, not much else has gone on as of late. No real good entertainment news (which is what I live for) and I haven’t even gone to the movies in a week. I’m slacking, I know. I was watching The 40 Year Old Virgin on HBO earlier tonight. I don’t know. Everyone raves about the movie and I’m wondering if it’s similar to Anchorman in that I need to see it 3 or 4 times before I really think it’s as funny as everyone else. The first time I saw Anchorman (and Napoleon Dynamite for that matter) I couldn’t believe how ridiculously stupid it was. Now I don’t think I go a day without quoting it. Guess we’ll have to wait for multiple HBO viewings before I make a decision on it. Hope everyone had a great weekend and be glad Monday’s over!!

PS – Holy Shit! Coral and Evan just got booted from the Challenge for being too injured to continue. That’s my girl! Plus, they were front runners so you know everyone was happy to see them go. Not to mention, Evan was talking about his hernia possibly strangling his intestine and he mispronounced intestine. Too frigging funny. I can go to bed happy.

The Plight of Music in my Car

As I was driving to work today, I was lamenting that my XM radio was not yet hooked up (which is my own fault because I’ve been too lazy to buy the new hookup I need) and went through the CD’s I have in my six CD changer in my car. They are as follows:

1) Chicago’s Greatest Hits 1982-1989
2) Mix CD I made - highlights include Crazy Bitch by Buckcherry, Promiscuous by Nelly Furtado, Leave the Pieces by the Wreckers, I Love You by Cheri Dennis, Conceited by Remy Martin and other such songs (if that makes sense)
3) Mix CD - highlights include Teenage Dirtbag by Wheatus, I Walk Alone by Oleander and other such alternative songs I can’t think of right now
4) Counting Crows - Live from the New Amsterdam
5) Soundtrack to the Broadway Musical “Avenue Q”
6) George Michael’s Greatest Hits - the fast songs

Sometimes I’m pretty sure there’s a gay man trapped in my body, which explains my love of men (preferably bald) and the Bravo network, but makes no sense of my baseball fascination. Anyway, I really do not have terrible taste in music. Honest, I don’t. I just caught myself at a bad time. Then again, I really don’t feel the need to explain myself because if you have never seen Avenue Q (Rob - you know who you are) then you can’t fully appreciate songs such as “The Internet is for Porn” and “Everyone’s a Little Bit Racist.” The pure wrongness of these songs just makes your day brighter, I promise. Counting Crows is a staple no matter what, and I had to get my mid-80’s Chicago fix. Other than that, I think it’s a nice eclectic mix. Sometimes I like really hard guitars with girl hating rock, and other times, sentimental country. I’m equal opportunity when it comes to my music. That’s all I’m trying to say.

Two more dancers were kicked off So You Think You Can Dance last night; Alison and Ryan. Ryan was deserved. I thought he should have gotten kicked off weeks ago, but Alison is a really phenomenal dancer. Then again, they all are at this point although I think Donyelle was the weak link and I would have kicked her and Ryan to the curb. My boy Travis is most certainly playing for the other team after watching his reactions to everyone getting kicked off and to him being the bottom 2. He did have a rough week and everyone else had great weeks (except for Ryan) so it made sense. I’m not knocking it. However, I did find out that Heidi and Benji are cousins which explained the toothy smiles, but made it insanely creepy for me to watch them dance ballroom together. I don’t know. To me, ballroom dancing is (and should be) like watching two people have sex. It should be sensual and make you wonder if they’re getting it on when they’re not dancing. They’re both incredible dancers, but I really wish they wouldn’t dance together ever again. I think it’s going to get really hard from this point on. Honestly, I think even this decision was really hard. I mean, they’re all great and apparently are going on tour. I have to say I would probably go see that. I find myself sometimes watching the backup dancers at certain concerts more than the performers and I’m curious to see how they would pull it off. It’s basically going to be an American Idol format where the top 10 perform and they’ll do some of their more popular dances from the show. Could be interesting.

World Series of Pop Culture put one team into the finals and they are The Boeghy Bunch, all decked out in blue polos and khakis. I like them cause they beat the team I hated most, the Velvet Rope Revolution. This one guy on the team was so cocky and it was great when he was booted cause he didn’t know all the stars from Dancing with the Stars in the tiebreak. However, that game lasted longer than normal so we still don’t know who the other team is going to be. Now I have to tune in for that and the Finals next week. The one team in contention (who I hope wins) is Almost Perfect Strangers, people who qualified at VHI.com with a pop culture quiz and just met each other the night before the show taped. I think it would be so cool if they won! I mean, to not know your teammates strengths and weaknesses and still be able to bring the pain is amazing to me! I have to laugh because I did go online this past week and take their pop culture quiz and sucked but I’ve kicked some major ass on the TV questions. Maybe next year I’ll be blogging from there! lol.. A girl can dream, can’t she?

Anyway, I’ll get into a little O’s chat. O’s won 6-4 last night and won the Series which is great. Rodrigo Lopez put in a performance. Not stellar, but hey… we got a win, am I right? And may I ask, what the hell is up with Fernando Tatis? He was on the ESPN ticker the other night and I think I looked at my Dad and said “who the fuck is that guy?” Apparently he got his first major league hit the same day that Roger Clemens broke a few records (like we care) and subsequently “fell off the face of the earth” in the words of Kevin Millar. I guess he’s back and since we’re giving our bench guys time to play (why the fuck not?) he’s doing his best to woo the organization. Way to go Fernando. I’ll take any port in a storm at this point. The majority of our remaining games are against teams in contention for the playoffs so let’s fuck with their heads a little bit and play some good baseball!

Anyway, if the rain holds off I’ve got a ball game tonight (our ONLY Friday night game) and a room reserved at Chez Kenny (my cousin’s boyfriend’s house). Tomorrow should consist of a day perusing Home Depot, Target and other such stores to get the house situated because we should be able to start bringing stuff over this week. Dad has polyurethaned most of the floors and it really looks like a place you can live in. Now if we can get the bats out of the chimney and the lone woodchuck out from under the garage I MIGHT not be afraid to stay there alone when Tre goes camping in the near future. Yeah, I don’t camp. I’ve gone camping twice and both times it poured and once I got all my shit stolen. I think I’m a bad camping omen so I figure it’s best for me to not do it. That’s probably when you’ll know I’m in love cause I don’t go camping for any reason. I’m really not sure if even true love can do it. Well, unless it’s Brian Roberts. I’d camp for him.

THIS IS FOR THE LADIES: Ever since my mom “retired” she’s been a bit of an online shopper. I’ve gotten some really cute skirts and cheap moisturizer out of the deal, so I don’t complain. However, she might have hit the jackpot this time. I know all of you have seen the infomercials for makeup made of minerals, of which there seem to be two brands: Bare Escentuals and the other one that’s endorsed by Leeza Gibbons and Melissa Gilbert. Well, my mom decided to buy Bare Escentuals and I would get to try it too. It came yesterday and we watched the instructional video (which was a waste and a little irritating) but figured we’d wait until today to try it. I tend to be red in the face (damn sensitive skin) so I was curious and pretty sure it wasn’t going to work. Well, I did it this morning and I admit that I was pleasantly surprised with the results. I don’t look like I’m wearing a mask, yet I feel like I’m covered. It’s not cheap, but then again, neither is the department store stuff when you really think about it, Plus, you don’t look like a drag queen when you wear it, which is something (straight) men seem to like! Anyway, I’ll keep you posted as to progress on the house (and my face) and I hope everyone has a very happy weekend!!!

Bad start to the day

I forgot my Ipod. Do you have any idea how quiet it is in this office? I am not the type of girl who can go without music and I forgot my freakin’ Ipod. I overslept (more on that later) and walked right out of the house without it. I mean, at least I know it’ll be charged when I go to use it tomorrow, but that’s not really helping me today. I’m gonna see if I can find an online radio station or something although if I have to download something to my computer I’m screwed. They don’t allow us to download ANYTHING, not even a cutesy screen saver, to our computers. Might crash the whole system or something to that effect. I did go on Yahoo!, remembering they have Launchcast stations so right now I’m listening to their Adult Alternative station, which doesn’t seem to be so bad, but I know I have to deal with commercials. I guess that’s my penance for forgetting my Ipod. I will pay the price.

Let’s get down to business: Harold Reynolds of ESPN has apparently been fired for sexual harassment. He says it was a hug and nothing more. Not my Harold! I love him! I’m not saying he didn’t do something wrong, but we do live in a money grubbing country where people will do anything for a buck, including manipulate and backstab. Let me just say, I’m disappointed. That’s all. I hope it all turns out for the best because I will miss him at ESPN. I still miss Keith Olbermann so I may never get over this.

I went to my sister’s ball game last night so I did not see ANY of So You Think You Can Dance. Hopefully I’ll be able to get some updates online today and I’ll do my best to watch the results show tonight. If not, well I’ll just hope that the people I don’t like get booted. Such is life. I did, however, manage to catch Project Runway. Ok, I saw the end before the beginning, but thanks to Bravo’s sly programming I was able to see what I missed directly after the show ended (Thank you Bravo!) So, where do I begin? Does Laura own an outfit that doesn’t show her ridiculously overexposed breastbones? For a mother of three, I really wish she’d cover up that pit of nothingness. One more thing on Laura: I like her. I think she’s really talented and her clothes seem really wearable. But just because she THINKS they’re going to be working with horses doesn’t mean she needs to wear an equestrian costume to the park. I mean, she was seriously done up in the pants, tall boots, the whole shebang. I expected her to be wearing that cute little jockey hat, regardless of the fact that she is WAY too tall to be one. Keith is a crazy bitch (and I dig that), and I really wish I hadn’t read all the spoilers cause I know it’s him going home next week. I wonder if they’ll kick anyone else off or just leave that as a “bye” week? I can’t wait to find out. And oh my god - as I was reading the credits last night I realized that Tim Gunn’s wardrobe is from Macy’s. Ok, the man works for Parsons School of Design and his suits are from Macy’s? I have nothing against Macy’s, but I’m also not pretending to be in the fashion world. I’m sure he gets them for free but you know Tim has some fierce Prada suits in his closet. Way to take one for the team Tim Gunn. It was Katherine’s turn to go although I am really ready to throw in Angela’s towel. Something about her smirky superiority irks me. I don’t know what it could be. As for Bradley - lucky break, my friend. It really would have sucked to get booted on your birthday! I’m a big fan of Uli, and I really like Bonnie too. She’s flown under the radar so much that I had to rewatch the show to even see her once. I’m not sure if that’s good or bad for her. Finally, the big deal this year was that there were (supposedly) lots of straight men. Um… where? Ok, Jeffrey and Michael are my guesses. Keith is questionable and since Malan was a vampire I really don’t think that counts. Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?

Bad news on this Thursday: Prince’s wife has filed for divorce. Guess he’s been a bit too busy promoting himself to be a good husband. Shame on you, Prince. (Prince Robert Nelson to his homies). Seriously, how do you have a last name like Nelson and name your kid Prince? Ok, granted, Ricky Nelson named his kid Gunnar which must have really sucked considering his brother’s name was something as trivial as Matthew. Don’t get me wrong, I laminated the Nelsons onto my trapper keeper in high school just like any other girl, but can you imagine the ridicule he got? No wonder he felt the need to redeem himself on Celebrity Fit Club! I mean, I’m not into really conventional names. If (god forbid) I spawn a boy, I plan to name him Ripken, even if I have to bribe his father to let me do so, but celebrities are really going over the edge with children’s names. I understand the whole individuality angle but public and private schools are a hotbed of ridicule. Way to scar your kid for life, even more than you already have.

Time to listen to some new music. Ever since I got my new car I haven’t listened to the radio because I haven’t been able to hook up my XM. Really, I’m just lazy and haven’t bought a new mount for it. I have the link, I just haven’t done it. It’s all my fault. Anyway, I’m usually pretty up on my music but I’ve been a bit of a slacker lately so hopefully I’ll be able to hear some new jams while I’m listening to Yahoo. I already heard Crazy by Gnarls Barkley for the first time and I enjoyed it. I hope I’m not subjected to that Paris Hilton single because I’m afraid my ears will start to bleed. My sister gave Justin Timberlake’s new single a bad review so now I’m curious. I’ll keep you posted. Happy almost Friday!

More reasons to watch TV

I never got into the show Lost, mainly because I wasn’t home enough to watch it on a constant basis. By the time I got my Tivo, I had already missed the majority of the show and felt I couldn’t commit to it. However, the addition of Rodrigo Santoro could change my mind. For those of you who don’t know who this handsome Brazilian is:

1) See picture at left

2) He romanced Laura Linney in Love Actually and tried to kill people in Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle

3) Have you looked at the picture?

Anyway, he’s a beautiful hunk of man (with an accent to boot) and if he’s gonna be on the Lost island, I want to be there too. If there is a God, he will be shirtless. I mean, they’re on a desert island. It’s GOT to be hot!

So, Lance Bass is gay. Is anyone shocked? There have been countless pictures of him with Reichen from the Amazing Race (Reichen - you can do better) and he hangs out at Kathy Griffin’s house. I mean, if you’re a guy hanging out at Kathy’s you might as well wrap yourself up in a rainbow flag and parade down the streets of P-Town. But hey, best of luck to you Lance, and congratulations for finally realizing that coming out isn’t going to ruin the careers of youself and any of the N’Sync boys. Most of them have done a good job of it themselves (What was the name of Chris Kirkpatrick’s clothing line? Fu Manchu or something?)You’ll have a show on Bravo before you know it and I’ll probably watch it! I can feel the glares and I’m ashamed already.

Remember my Work Out rant from yesterday? I still hate Brian. I caught a little bit of the episode when I got back from the movies last night and he’s just this petty little child! Apparently he told Rebecca (Amazing Race girl) that Jesse (new gay trainer) called her a slut (which she probably is) and then HE confronted him about it because he said he would "take care of it." So why tell her in the first place? DRAMA... After Jesse and Rebecca had settled things, he still couldn’t help but be a douchebag. He doesn’t need a southern accent to sound stupid, he’s doing it all on his own. I can’t wait till he gets fired cause I’ll be shocked if it doesn’t happen. I’m not talking gay Lance Bass shocked, more like ousting of Chris Daughtry shocked.

I went to see You, Me and Dupree last night. Eh… it was ok. I really like Kate Hudson and she was pretty good in it, but I’m just not a huge Owen Wilson fan. However, as much as he played a complete fuck-up, I really started to feel for him near the end of the movie, so I guess he’s good at what he does. I think Matt Dillon looks better now than he did in the 80’s and 90’s and Michael Douglas is just… well… old! I never thought I’d say that. It’s like he all of a sudden turned 80. Him and Tom Skerrit. They were like, my hot old men and now they just look rugged, but not in the good way. They kind of look like they got rode hard and put away wet.

Ok, my last rant of the morning. Do you ever feel like a lazy son of a bitch for taking the elevator? Not so much at work, but in the parking garage. I always park on the 4th floor because it’s easy to find a space and I always take the elevator cause I wear cute shoes that aren’t very comfortable. So, people walk by me to the stairs as I’m waiting, and I can feel them looking at me and I feel like they’re thinking “she could stand to take the stairs” or something else disparaging because I’ve done the same thing (which is wrong and I understand that). What I really want to do is say to them (the men especially) is “walk a day in my shoes and see if you want to take the stairs!” If I’m wearing comfortable shoes, I will attempt the stairs. However, since I haven’t been to the gym in three months the stairs are not my friend so I’m taking the easy way out. Isn’t that what America is all about!?

There may be more later. After all, tonight is Project Runway AND So You Think You Can Dance! And to think, I actually considered leaving the house tonight. What the hell was I thinking? Happy Birthday Cousin!!!

Tuesday is Reality TV Day

I couldn’t help but post this link that my friend (and ex-babysitter) Shell sent to me today. Now, we all know I am not a fan of celebrity babies (even though their pampered lives aren’t really their fault) but if they had any brains at all, this is probably exactly what they would say (ya know, if they could talk).

So, Richard Hatch is going to jail and appearing nude in an indie film. Explain to me why that is necessary (the nudity thing, not jail). I guess he’s the poster child for all money winners around the world. Pay your god damn taxes! I mean, it’s not like he didn’t make quite a bit of dough after winning Survivor on promotional appearances alone. He probably made the tax money within a couple of months! You’re an idiot, Richard. I believe he’s already shot his nude role which is too bad because prison would probably get him down to fighting weight. Then again, it’s not like he’s gonna try to fight off would-be anal sex predators (with anything more than a girly slap) so maybe it’s all for the best. Don’t look at me like that. He’s gay and more than likely enjoys anal sex. I’ve seen Oz and apparently most prisoners like anal sex too. I’m just spouting nonsense that I’ve learned from cable television. Give me a break!

Today is C. Thomas Howell’s wedding anniversary. 14 years, I believe. Anyway, that’s not the great part. What I enjoyed the most is what when I looked up his profile on www.imdb.com, he was listed as “child rodeo star.” Now, I don’t frequent the rodeo circuit unless you count the mechanical bull at the Columbia County Fair (which has been sorely missed, might I add) but I would love to know how good old C. Thomas parlayed that into a career playing Ponyboy Curtis. Regardless, congratulations to him for a marriage in Hollywood (kind of) that’s lasted more than it’s obligatory 15 minutes. Then again, I think he married a regular gal. That always helps.

I caught the majority of Bravo’s new show Work Out, which starts at its regular time tonight at 9. I’m not sure what to think of it yet. I would kill for any of the bodies on these trainers (one of whom has already outlasted her 15 minutes as a contestant on The Amazing Race), that’s for damn sure. The owner of the gym, Jackie, is an uberbitch but we all know I like that and it’s good television! She doesn’t have much of a personality but a girlfriend with a fiery temper. She’s also a biter…. OUT of the bedroom. That’s a little creepy but hey, everyone loves a bit of drama. I’ve never seen a woman pull off a Mohawk like Jackie does so I’m gonna give her a shot and see if she makes any of her trainers throw up on this week’s installment. There’s this one trainer, Brian who actually says “these are the hands of Michelangelo” referring to himself. Um, last I checked you weren’t really using your hands for anything but to feel up the slutty Amazing Race girl who has a boyfriend, but sits on Brian’s face at a moment’s notice while there are clients in the gym. But hey, who am I to judge other people’s relationships!? What I’m trying to say is that I hope Brian gets fired and that the cute, new gay trainer kicks his overly masculine ass. Then screws him in it. OH shoot.. that was mean and I apologize. What is up with me and the ass references today?

Speaking of asses, I caught the Real Word/Road Rules Challenge: Fresh Meat last night. While my favorite retard Wes didn’t get in the Exile, he did try to help Eric and Katie win by giving them some insider insight, which blew up in his face. Katie can’t walk two feet without hacking up a lung from the cigarettes perpetually attached to her face and Eric is… well… he’s a big boy. Kenny is in great shape and Tina, well… if her legs moved as fast as her mouth they’d win in a landslide. But anyway, I was in and out of a Nyquil induced haze so forgive me if this synopsis isn’t complete, but both teams busted through the puzzles which allowed them to drop their bags (extremely helpful for Eric and Katie who packed about 60 or so pounds more than Tina and Kenny) and even though they forgot the flag, Tina and Kenny were able to pull it out by a considerable margin. The look on Wes’s face when they showed up at the door instead of his beloved Katie and Eric (who he would have backstabbed if they had made it back) was priceless. I think his little Mohawk fell just a tad that day…. or maybe that was the Australian humidity. Who knows?

I have every intention of going to the movies tonight, but my one friend wants to go to the late show. I know it’s pathetic, but I really like going to bed whenever I fall asleep (usually shortly after 10) instead of forcing myself to stay awake. I mean, I guess if the movie is good enough I shouldn’t have to force myself, but still. My throat is still killing me and nothing (but that Nyquil induced haze I mentioned earlier) is helping. I’m not sure what (if anything ) we’ll see tonight, but I narrowed it down to the following: Lady in the Water; You, Me and Dupree; My Super Ex-Girlfriend and Clerks II. If there’s anything to review, you know I’ll do it.

Oh yeah... the Orioles are attempting to play baseball tonight. It's a pretty good bet that there will be no significant trades before the deadline which means lots of fun in the offseason (we can only hope)!

Time for (yet another) cake party for an office birthday. My birthday is the next one so everyone is probably depressed cause it’ll be like… three weeks before we have cake again. We might go into withdrawal! It was carrot cake - no cake for me!!!

PS - I couldn't find a picture of my man, Alex Trebek to post but let it be known that if Ken Jennings has any more disparaging remarks to make about him, I will throw down. You do NOT accuse Alex of being a robot and bad mouth him. Without Jeopardy you'd be nobody! Ok, wait... you ARE nobody, but a nobody with a lot of money and you have my man Alex to thank for that. Don't bite the hand that feeds you Ken...

Seacrest Out

What a show!

Wow! The show last night was amazing! I didn’t get home until 12:30 (a half hour of that was just getting from SPAC to 87 but that’s to be expected) and I’m pretty tired today. Looks like it’ll be a Red Bull kind of day (Sorry Sandra)! Anyway, Huey performed first and there really was no fanfare. He just came out on stage by himself and played the harmonica for a bit before the band came out and then it was on! I knew every single song and sang along the whole time. The seats we had were really good too. They were in front of the stage in the second tier, so I had a really good view. Let me tell you something… Huey Lewis has aged really well! I mean, he looks phenomenal and sounds exactly like he did in 1984. I think it would be a great concert for anyone to go to because I’m sure you don’t realize how many of his songs you really know. The high point for me (as it always is) is the section where they sing acapella (sp.). They always sing one of my favorite songs “It’s Alright” and their voices just sound amazing together, especially with no other accompaniment. I love it! Anyway, he performed for an hour and a half and after a brief intermission, Chicago came out. They were really good but I wasn’t as excited about them as I was about Huey. I mean, I’m more of a 1982-1989 Chicago fan and they literally sang one song from that era. I don’t know if they’re attempting to forget the Peter Cetera era, but I was a little disappointed by that. However, they were really great. I love heavy horns (in my music, kids) and they certainly gave you that! As far as I know they sang all their really popular hits from the 70’s which put everyone on their feet. The great thing was that all of Huey Lewis and the News came out and they did one song together which was amazing! The trombone player for Chicago REALLY needs a stylist, but other than that I thought it was great! The lead guitarist for Chicago was an unexpected piece of eye candy, that’s for damn sure.

The house is really coming along. I finished the woodwork in the spare room yesterday but it looks like Dad will spend much of his day doing touch ups cause painting without taping is not my forte. Also, I’m having a bit of an issue. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it, but I LOVE the color of the spare room. It’s called Brick Dust from Behr and it’s this awesome shade of dusty pink. I truly adore it. So, apparently I’ve been waxing poetic about it so much that everyone is wondering why I don’t make it my bedroom instead of the other room. Many reasons for that, one of which being the lamp. I know it sounds silly, but I matched the whole other room around this ridiculously expensive lamp and I love it. However, the bedspread I got looks like it’ll match better in the other room so I’m really torn. The spare room is definitely brighter and doesn’t face the yapping dogs next door, but I think it’s slightly smaller as far as wall space. I should look and see if I have the receipt for the lamp. I can’t be upset about getting $100 back, am I right? I really need to look at both rooms and see if I can fit everything I need. But anyway, a lot got done this weekend so it looks like my dad will be able to polyurethane the floors earlier this week than we had expected. Appliances come Wednesday and after that the floors need to be put in, the front room needs to be sheetrocked and painted and the electric really needs to get done. Other than that, we’re in business.

So, for those of you that don’t know, my 30th birthday is rapidly approaching on August 15th. It’s my sister’s too, but is this blog about her? I think not. So anyway, as I was rummaging through the fridge on Thursday I realized the Orioles are playing at Yankee Stadium on my birthday. My sister is a huge Yankee fan and I (obviously) am an O’s fan. What better way to spend our birthday than watching that game!? So, when we hit up the Moosehead on Thursday night I mentioned it, and my friend Jen was a taker. I had completely forgotten about it until yesterday and she called me this morning saying that she got four bleacher seats and we are most definitely in business! I can’t wait! It’s gonna be a busy couple of weeks with the move in, Nytropalooza and this, but well worth it. Perhaps it will take the edge off turning 30! lol..

Anyway, it’s Monday and the only way I’m going to stay awake is to pretend to do some work. You all try to do the same and I’ll post more later.

What a waste of a good hair night

Here it is. Saturday night and I’m sitting in front of my computer instead of doing something fun. Granted, it’s pouring like a son of a bitch and I did have options, but my motivation for leaving the house dwindled into nothingness when I was confronted with the weather outside (it’s a tad frightful, if you must know). Therefore, I will take the time to update you on the mundane details I consider my life.

Last night I went to my sister’s ball game and then went to Andy’s after the game. Well, the members of our fall softball team were also there. These are the people that pretty much lied about me and told me that I was too slow to play ball. This, coming from a guy who had to be fast cause he couldn’t hit a ball past the infield. So, I couldn’t wait to see if he and his troll like girlfriend had the balls to talk to me. He actually did say hello and I think my exact words were “I don’t think so.” I so hate pretending I like someone when I don’t, especially when you’ve lied about and insulted me in the past. I hold grudges. BIG ones. The troll did attempt to wave to my friend Jen who pretty much cut her off at the pass. There was a lot of staring and I found it so damn entertaining. Apparently because we don’t live in Albany we’re not allowed in Albany bars so I think we blew up their spot and had a hell of a lot more fun than they did. I can’t imagine why no one said goodbye! After some jungle juice (thanks Fish) and a few beers, and a stray elbow to the lip, my sister and I ended the night with a shot of Three Wise Men. That is a mistake I will never make again and I really don’t know how I didn’t puke the minute it touched my lips. I woke up at 6:15 this morning and could still taste it. I immediately got up and brushed my teeth and tongue until there were no more remnants of alcohol-y taste on either one. As I was doing this, my friend’s dog came into the bathroom to chill out and then followed me back down the stairs to the sleeper sofa I was sharing with my sister. He sat by my side for a few minutes until he decided it would be better to hop into bed with us. Jumped right over me in between the two of us and made himself very comfortable; comfortable being his ass in my face and head on my thigh. So all in all, it was a pretty good night! I couldn’t seem to fall asleep when we got home earlier this morning, so I went to the house to try and get some more stuff done. I ended up painting the second coat in my bedroom and touching up the areas in the spare room that my Dad had caulked. After a few hours of productivity, I thought it would be ok to come home and take a nap. I was actually slightly distracted by The Witches of Eastwick on A&E (I’ve never seen it) but drowsiness won out and so began my evening of lethargy. I finally motivated myself to take a shower around 7:30 and really that was only because I was still covered in paint. I did my hair (hence the title of this post) and somewhere in between, changed out of my jeans and into my jammies and resigned myself to my bed for the rest of the night. My intentions were to watch the first Pirates of the Caribbean but I know I’m not going to stay awake long enough so I’ve shot that plan to shit too. Instead, I’m checking out the 100 Greatest Kids Stars on VH1. I actually like Tina Yothers better with her rock star makeover and Corey Haim did not age gracefully. Or else his stylist and makeup person were on vacation the day he shot his interview. You decide.

Tomorrow is Huey Lewis Day, reminiscent of either “Rex Manning Day” from Empire Records or “Nudie Magazine Day” from Billy Madison. Actually, I take that back because both those events are kinda creepy and Huey Lewis Day is anything but creepy. Speaking of Rex Manning, I was so skeeved by that role because the guy who played Rex Manning (Maxwell Caulfield) also played Michael in Grease 2 and I loved him in that movie. He had that adorable accent and good guy persona so you can imagine that I did not want him to bang Renee Zellweger in the count out room. It just seemed, well, dirty and pervlike. But anyway, back to Huey Lewis. Tomorrow night is the Huey Lewis and the News/Chicago concert and I’m going with my mother and father. Dad is actually a Huey Lewis fan too, but I’m pretty sure Mom is only going because of Chicago. Chicago was the first concert I ever saw but unfortunately, it was the first concert after the departure of Peter Cetera. Granted, the guy that replaced him sounded just like him, but it was the 80’s and it was Peter Cetera! It’ll more than likely be a very late night on Sunday night so I’ll have to post a review of sorts in the near future.

I was supposed to see Clerks II this weekend and my plan fell through. I love Kevin Smith movies (ok, I have yet to see Jersey Girl but that’s only because I feel it’s only right to watch Jersey Girl after watching Gigli, and I’m afraid that if I rent them both at the same time the video store might swallow me up or crumble to the ground) and I’m really looking forward to Clerks II. As usual, it hasn’t gotten great reviews, but I don’t think any of his movies have been anything more than cult classics. I mean, Clerks itself got it’s due thanks to word of mouth and video rentals. Still, I want to see it and when I do, I’ll let you know what I think. There are actually quite a few movies out that I would like to see, but time and money have been getting in the way. It’s amazing that for someone who loves everything about reality shows, I loathe reality.

Yet another update on the old man and the dog. I left my car in the Valatie turnaround over night and when my sister pulled in to drop me off, who do I see? You guessed it! The old man and his dog, picking up empty cans. There was an older woman sitting in a car waiting for them because it was raining out so not only does he have a dog, but it looks like he’s married. As I got in my car I looked up to make sure they weren’t in the way and he smiled at me. I thought that would not be the best time to tell him to walk his dog on the inside so I simply smiled back at him. What a way to start the morning.

After my mean post about Casey Fossum yesterday I guess it was only fair for the O’s to lose 14-7 and to have Russ Ortiz not be able to do, well, anything. He got the loss and let’s commend the front office for THAT acquisition. For the love of God, please do something in the offseason. Do whatever you can to keep Miggy, find some pitching and bring in some fresh meat. I mean, god knows we’re rebuilding but bring in people who might stick around through that time and not be in their mid-40’s. Is it just me or do we always seem to acquire the stars on their way to the middle of the downward spiral? You want examples – Sosa and Bonilla. We were supposed to get these great hitters and we got lots of money paid out on contracts that never panned out. Bring in a guy like Texeira and cut out the dead weight. Do your job. Score update – the bad end of an ass whooping. Top of 7 losing 13-3. I can say nothing more on this topic for fear I will drive to Baltimore myself to hold a sit-in at the door of Peter Angelos.

Anyway, hope everyone’s having a great weekend. Make the most of what’s left!

Finally, it's Friday!

Here’s a little eye candy for the ladies. Mr. Bobblehead himself and the future Mr. Nytransky. Then again, I guess I could change my name to his cause I’ve always been looking for a nice Smith or Jones to alleviate the torture of listening to telemarketers butcher the hell out of it. Anyway, if I had an extra $200 laying around I would be more than happy to attend Brian's Baseball Bash on Sunday August 20th (as his arm candy, of course) and meet a plethora of Orioles but alas, he hasn’t asked me. I’ll live, plus unless it rains I have a softball tournament that weekend and I can’t let my team down considering I’m good for one play every six games. I mean, those are good odds! lol.. But anyway, the O’s have Bedard starting tonight (who may be our only hope at this point) against Fossum of the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, who really should have had his head shot picture retaken cause WOW…. he looks like he just walked out of a West Virginia mine and said “I bet I can throw that ball past the mountains.” (I mean no offense to miners with that comment, as I’m sure my blog has been perpetuated by miner comments). So, let’s see if Bedard can pull out a win tonight and give me a good start to my weekend.

Anyway, let’s get to the real news: TV!!!! I did not have a chance to post my thoughts on Project Runway so here they are, better late than never. I was not a Malan fan but I’m disappointed to see him leave this early because I think he could have been a bit of a troublemaker. His pretentious accent and vampire like looks aside, I thought he had a lot of potential. If you watched the casting special you would see that he’s auditioned every year and actually made it on the show last year but turned them down. I have a feeling Tim Gunn and the others had that warm, fuzzy feeling in their stomachs when he got the boot. I mean, come on! That dress was heinous! I loathe Vincent and Angela but at least their (Ok, Vincent’s) dress was something a woman could wear and not look like a potato (minus the unflattering epaulets of course). I think it would have been pretty sad if Kayne (that’s his name, right? Who names their kid Kayne?) hadn’t won considering his extensive pageant background! I will miss Malan cause I think he might have had a bit of a Santino effect (although no one will ever imitate Tim Gunn as Santino did) and now I have to rely on Jeffrey to do so because it seems Keith (who looks to be getting a bit snarky in the next episode) is the culprit behind the whole “I have to ask you to leave” on the promo and will be departing in the near future. Apparently (innocent until proven guilty) he stole some of his designs from ones already on the runway for established designers. Guess we have to wait and see what happens but I’ll be sad to see him go too, mainly because it looks like he’s gonna get bitchy and isn’t that the fun of Project Runway in the first place?

Last night was Wing Night so I didn’t get to see the Results special of So You Think You Can Dance but I do know who got kicked off: Martha and Dmitry, he of the chest baring outfits and apparently heterosexual orientation. I’m not sure if any of the boys left are gay, straight or asexual but I still don’t think it was his time. He’s a classically trained ballroom dancer and I guess they don’t see him loosening up much and America likes their dancers “controversial.” Martha’s solo was atrocious and jerky and she really did deserve to leave because all the other girls did pretty well with their own solos. So, now we’re down to 8 and I’m curious to see who gets paired with who for next week. Contrary to my previous post, I do like watching Heidi dance so I wouldn’t mind if her and Travis got to stick together for another week, but we’ll have to wait until next week to see what happens. A TV show I did NOT miss last night was The World Series of Pop Culture, now on its regular night and time of 10:00 on Thursday. I really couldn’t believe some of the questions people were missing. I understand that being on that stage under the lights with all sorts of people watching you is a lot of pressure but the earlier questions are just so easy that I can’t see how you can go on stage at this level and not hazard a guess. I’m not gonna lie; I didn’t know what team Tony had played baseball for on Who’s the Boss (St. Louis Cardinals) or the drag names on Bosom Buddies (Buffy and Hildegarde) but other than that I pulled some stuff out of my ass and if this rolls around again, I’m recruiting Chris and Sandra as my partners. I don’t know if we could come up with as good a name as Peanut Butter and Ginelli, but I’m willing to give it a shot.

It’s Friday, thank god and I can’t wait to get out of here today. I have the Huey Lewis concert on Sunday and some painting to do in the house this weekend. There might be a painting party this weekend so bring your brushes and we’ll bring the brew! lol.. Enjoy your weekends and I’ll let you know how things go in the very near future. TGIF!

I love this kid!

This kid is Travis, from "So You Think You Can Dance." He's one of the top 5 boys and after watching the show tonight I have absolutely no clue how he can't win. Not only is he an amazing partner, but he flips through hip hop, contemporary and lyrical (which I usually hate, but was transfixed when he was on the screen) like it's nobody's business. Sure, he's a cute kid (emphasis on kid - he's 18) but blondes aren't my thing so this isn't anything close to my Chris Daughtry fascination. No boy should be able to spin the way he does and I adore him. I really wish I had watched this show from the beginning because I would like to see the other dance genres he's had to contend with. As far as this show goes, I'm surprised by a lot of what the judges have said. As I watch most of these couples they just don't look together, yet no one says anything about it. I'm far from a professional and don't pretend to be a choreographer, but I've always been taught that when you're dancing with someone (unless you're doing a completely different step) that you should be in sync. Regardless of all that, I'm addicted. I really wish someone would do a marathon of this show so I could get more involved. I mean, that's what sucked me in to both America's Next Top Model and Project Runway!

Well, movie night was a bust. We were told that there was a showing of Pirates of the Caribbean 2 at 6:20. I got a call at 5:30 telling me that the next showing was at 7:20. Apparently the movie is about 2 and a half hours long so that wouldn't get me home until about 11. I was game, but I would have preferred an earlier show. Luckily, by the time I got to the mall everyone had decided to forgo the movie in favor of dinner at Houlihan's. It was a good time but I was much happier to be home by 8:30 rather than 11! Granted, I'm a loser and my whole point was that I wanted to be home in time to catch Project Runway but I also got home in time for my new fascination. If I have to mention it again then stop reading right now cause you obviously haven't read a thing I've written.

So basically what I'm trying to say is there will be no review tonight but maybe when I get around to watching the first one, I'll tell you what I thought. Hopefully that will motivate me to want to see the second one for a good reason.

Ok, I'm back to my new favorite show and I'm not trying to be a bitch, but thank god Heidi has a body cause she looks like she fell off the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. She's a phenomenal dancer, don't get me wrong, but I can't get past her face. She's partnered with my boy this week so I'm forced to watch her. Her solo was really good but again, I get distracted. My boy is remarkable and she did quite well considering it wasn't her style of dance. I think he bought out the best in her and I think they're both safe this week. Then again, I thought Chris Daughtry was gonna win American Idol so really, who am I to judge?

Ok.. I'm obviously distracted by the TV and can concentrate on nothing but so I hope everyone had a wonderful hump day and I'll catch ya later. Time for Project Runway!!!!

Oh Happy Day!

The man and his dog are back! I saw them yesterday morning, happy as can be on their morning walk. However, they were standing in the middle of the road, waiting to cross. Now, this is probably the busiest road in Columbia County and they’re standing in the middle of it. I understand that neither of them are getting any younger and it’s probably hard enough to cross this road, as most cars are going at a good clip of 55-70 but again, the old man just continues to make me nervous. Regardless, I’d like to welcome them back to my life and reiterate how happy I am that nothing is wrong!

Ok, no post yesterday and I apologize. I got home from my ball game (more on that in a minute) and was beat. I fell asleep almost immediately after my head hit the pillow and that hasn’t been the trend lately. I don’t know if it’s the heat or the fact that I have the smallest window in the house and therefore, the shittiest air conditioner but I’ve become accustomed to waking up at least twice during the night and praying that I instantly fall back to sleep. It doesn’t always work.

Tonight is movie night and yes, we’re going to see The Pirates of the Caribbean 2. Didn’t see the first one. I really tried but since there was no rainout last night, there was nothing I could do. I’ve actually heard this one sucks compared to the first one so maybe it’s good that I’m seeing this one first because then it won’t put a bad taste in my mouth for the third. Or maybe I’ll lose interest completely. Guess we’ll have to see. I heard the special effects are really good and I love Keira Knightley in all her emaciated glory! Ok, she’s not anorexic, just blessed with good (anorexic) genes. But seriously, I have loved her ever since Bend it Like Beckham and she graces one of my most favorite girly chicks of all time, Love Actually. What can I say? I’m a sucker for an accent. So, we’ll see how she fares in this film and if I’m not completely exhausted I’ll post a tiny review later on tonight.

New favorite song: St. Robinson in His Cadillac Dream by Counting Crows. I discovered this song on their new live album that I single handedly downloaded off Itunes. It might have one of the best lines ever in it: “I may not go to Heaven but I hope you go to Hell.” Granted, it’s probably been said a million times but I’m not sure if it’s ever been used in song. Thank you Adam Duritz, thank you. Counting Crows and the Goo Goo Dolls are coming to SPAC on August 7th so if anyone is interested in going, let me know. I rarely miss a live Counting Crows opportunity, regardless of the fact that I am irritated by the experience every time. I love singing along at concerts and Adam Duritz constantly changes the way he sings (and the words for that matter) and I know that’s part of the live experience but I just want to hear what I want to hear and sing along. Isn’t that the point? That’s why I can’t see “jam bands” like Dave Matthews because I don’t want to hear them go off for 20 minutes on a song that could have been done 17 minutes prior. I mean, they have lots of songs and if they didn’t go nuts I could hear even more of the songs I love.

O’s dropped a game to the A’s after an 87 minute rain delay last night, knocking off their three game winning streak. My cousin and her kids are down there right now so I hate to disappoint them with the loss, but I can guarantee they’re still having a great time with their upgraded seats! However, no one is going to get a Brian Roberts bobblehead until September unless they hit up the Delmarva Shore birds game. Apparently the dolls that were supposed to be given away last Saturday had skin resembling that of a Smurf. I get it, B-Rob’s not the tallest player in the pack, but a Smurf? Give the poor guy a break! Hasn’t he had enough trouble getting back to form this year and trying to lead a subpar team?

Oh shoot, I almost forgot about the ball game. Well, I struck out my first time up. Looking. I laughed all the way to the bench. The first two strikes were so bad that I couldn't believe he called the last one. Such is life. So, for some reason, the graying (not that there's anything wrong with that), middle aged (again, nothing wrong with that) shortstop came right out of the gates gunning for me. I guess when you strike out in slow pitch softball they just assume you suck. He was at first for the last out of the inning and the pitcher turned around to throw it to me at second for the last out of the inning and as this guy is running, he yelled at me. I mean, like "RAR" so I would drop the ball. What am I, 12? I caught the ball, stepped on the bag and turned to him and said "are you serious?" I mean, come on. He kind of had this defeated look on his face and murmured "no" and all I could say was "good thing." Everyone on my team said my face was absolutely priceless when this happened and I can imagine it would have been. What's really funny is that I probably have the most attitude of any of the girls on my team so I'm definitely the wrong one to screw with. I love it when they pick the wrong girl! This continues throughout the game. If a ball gets hit to me, he yells "that's trouble" and other such things. Apparently my Chuck Knoblauch reputation has preceded me. So, he's up with a girl on 1st with one out in the bottom of the 7th and is trying like hell to hit it to me cause his team was only down by 4 or so runs. He succeeds, and the ball takes a bad hop which I barehanded to get the girl out at second. He's cursing himself on first while I give him the stare down. I love that it means that much to these people that they win. I'm gonna have a beer, some dinner and go home to bed regardless of whether I win or lose. Not gonna beat myself up either way. Don't get me wrong, winning is way better, but you can't win all the time. Anyway as pathetic as it may be, it made my night to force him to go home and drown his sorrows in his Genny Cream Ale.

In other news - Pamela Anderson and Kid Rock are set to marry. I thought the party I went to this weekend had a redneck vibe but good god, this could be the biggest white trash party of the year! I guess when you’re a celebrity being apart from someone for three or four years and watching you both bang random B-listers makes you realize how important love and marriage is. Best of luck to you both but don’t make the “not getting a blood test” mistake twice, ok Pam?

Ok, enough chatting. Time to get to work. It’s hump day so enjoy it as best you can!

I have a question

Why does the soap in public bathrooms smell like Fruity Pebbles? I'm not kidding. I was in the bathroom at work today and I smelled a smelly smell. It took me a minute, but I realized that it was a smell from my childhood and that smell is Fruity Pebbles. It's a great smell, don't get me wrong, but Fruity Pebbles should not remind you of public urination.

I'm supposed to be watching the first Pirates of the Caribbean movie but I didn't get around to it. We're actually having a movie night for work and we're supposed to see the second one but it seems that everyone has already seen it (except for me because I knew it was the movie night movie so why would I see it beforehand?). So, they're thinking of switching the movie to The Devil Wears Prada which (as any of my blog readers should know) I've already seen. I don't mind going to see it again but it costs $7 to go see a movie down in Hudson and at least $11 to see it in Albany. Not to mention I don't understand the concept of seeing a movie without popcorn (what's the point) and you know it's gonna cost you $5 for a small soda. But, in the name of all that's employable, I'm sure I'll still go. It'd look bad if I backed out now, am I right? So anyway, since I didn't watch the first movie and everyone says you HAVE to see the first before the second, I almost hope they change the movie, that's my point.

Remember the post about me being an awful painter? That still holds true. I thought maybe it was a one day thing... nope! I'm bad. The bathroom color is amazing and hopefully will look good when it's done, but the first coat just looks, well, atrocious. I think it's probably because I did the edging first around the whole room and then went back and did the actual wall so, the edges look a bit darker I also think it had something to do with the fact that the roller was still a little wet. I'm not sure if that makes a difference but (to my untrained eye) it seemed like it did. There is paint all over the bathroom and all over me. Thank god it's water based and that I'm painting the floor and getting rid of the sink because they both now look like the church in Steel Magnolias. I just mean swathed in pink, not necessarily "blush" and "bashful."

I got the call today regarding an audition for a local production of the Will Rogers Follies. A friend of mine is choreographing it and she asked me if I'd audition. I'm really looking forward to doing it. She said if I wanted to audition for a singing part I was more than welcome to, but I got over that whole singing anywhere but my car and the shower in high school so I think I'll just dance! I'll keep you posted on that. The show is October 27th and they're talking about having rehearsals at least twice a week starting in August. Should be interesting. I'm wondering if I'm really able to commit to that much, only because it's still summer and ball isn't over until later on in August. Luckily, I'm a quick learner so I hope that'll help!

Oh well, time to finish my laundry and get my shit together for my ball game tomorrow. I really hope it rains because if we have to play ball in this blistering heat I might die. Ok, not literally, but it won't be a pretty sight and isn't co-ed softball all about the pretty? If you've ever seen some of the teams we play against, you would completely understand the sarcasm that statement is laced with. Congrats - your Monday is over.

Oh, the disappointment

No pictures. I was too busy drinking, talking and playing games of beer pong to take any. Ok, that’s a lie. I do have a great picture of Amy passed out on the couch just prior to her hour and a half puking tirade but I thought it’d be best to keep that one to myself. Anyway, had a great time, good breakfast and a hellish drive home. Had to stop and take a slight nap so I could finish up the drive. I felt pretty good when I got up that morning but the longer the day went on, the more tired I got. A cat nap and some Red Bull and I felt like a new person. Still pretty exhausted though and can’t wait to go to bed. I might even have to miss Entourage tonight and we all know how much I hate skipping my weekly dose of Jeremy Piven.

I’ve spent the last twenty minutes being distracted by the movie XXX (no, not porn – just Vin Diesel) so that’s probably a pretty good indication that I should just go the hell to bed. Hope everyone had a good weekend!

Live Free or Die

In honor of my jaunt to New Hampshire tomorrow, I figured I'd post this picture of me, Amy and Eryn before Brandi's wedding last month. Now all we have to do is make it to Boston to visit Amy and it'll be one hell of a trifecta! I'm looking forward to getting the hell out of town and relaxing with those guys. It's gonna be a great time and I will be armed with my camera and beer. I can only imagine the entertainment. On my way home on Sunday I need to stop by my co-worker/friend Lacey's 21st birthday party. Oh, those were the days for sure! It's only slightly depressing that she turns 21 the month before I turn 30 but let's not dwell on such inane things. Happy Birthday to Lacey and I only hope she remembers half of what she does this weekend.

So, a few days ago I posted about the little old man and his dog and ever since then, nada. I have not seen this guy once and I'm used to seeing him every day so I have to admit, I'm a little nervous. Also, I spent two hours trying to find a pair of black flip flops to no avail. I mean, seriously. Black flip flops! It's freaking July, how hard can that be? I'm one of those people who hates it when people wear a black t-shirt and brown shoes so I really need to find a pair ASAP. Guess I'll be stopping at the outlets on my way there as one of my 14 errands that I need to run before I go!

I'm afraid that these last few posts have been a tad well... boring but hey, I can't be on all the time! Well, I could be, but I choose not to. Seriously though, it's been an incredibly long and boring week andI'm insanely happy that it's the weekend, even if right now it consists of me watching "Bridget Jones's Diary" on Bravo until I fall asleep. Have a great weekend!

Note to self: Hire painters next time

I’m really not that domestic. I’ve realized that now. Granted, I was pretty sure of it before this day, but now I’m positive. I’m an awful painter. Awful. However, I seem to be a pretty good taper and I attempted to do a lot of the edging sections. Thank god you do more than one coat, right? Anyway, I would like to thank my friend Sarah and my cousin Chrissy for all their help today. I would have gotten little done without them so “thanks!” The spare room looks great and my bedroom has really come together. We still need to do the woodwork in both rooms but now it’s actually beginning to look like a house. I tackled the woodwork in the bathroom but (see above) I’m not a good painter so the woodwork around the window looks like a train wreck. The rest of the room didn’t come out so bad but it’s really hard to cover up that pepto-bismol colored primer with white.

God knows I hate to be boring but the painting has pretty much consumed my day. I’m not even up on my regular entertainment news which is always disappointing for me. Tomorrow is another day and I’m sure I’ll catch up. Hopefully the day will go by quickly tomorrow since I was out today. I know, I’m such a rebel!

Right now I’m catching what I believe is the first season of Grey’s Anatomy and I’m just not used to having it on Thursday nights. I mean, I planned my Sunday nights around that show and Thursday is the one night where I might actually have a life. Tivo, where are you? Come back to me! Just biding time until the World Series of Pop Culture comes on again. I swear, it’s so addicting because I’m curious to know how I could have done had I remembered when the auditions were. I figure between me, C. Howe and Sandra we could have put a good dent into the competition. I can’t come up with a good team name as of yet though.

Still not efficient enough to post links. I really tried. I had a fellow blogger (thank you Rob) send me step by step instructions yet I still couldn’t do it. I followed them to a “T” but it didn’t work. Perhaps I’m not meant to help you find cool sites. You’re going to have to do it on your own (and when you do, make sure you tell me about it!) Well, it’s about that time and my life was very uninteresting today so I’m going to spare you from that. TGIF!

I know you can't get enough

so I figured I'd post some more idiotic ramblings for the masses.

I'll get to Project Runway but I'm presently watching the "He's Just Not That Into You" episode of Sex and the City and I have to wonder if anyone but Carrie Bradshaw ever wore tights that either have knee pads in them or have the knees cut out. I can't figure out which way it's going but at least if the knee pads are built in there's some sort of function there. I love the show, but I never really got the avant-garde fashion that Patricia Field tried to bring in. I mean, the name necklace, the flower brooch - things real people can wear. But I've been down teh streets of NYC a couple times and have never seen anyone wearing kneeless tights, or satin hot pants with 10 inch heel unless they were a hooker. Perhaps that's how Carrie afforded her apartment. Rent control my ass!

Anyway, Project Runway: The casting special wasn't terrible. I admit I was curious as to what some castmembers were doing, although I really would have liked to have seen that southern blonde from last season slumming it as a manager at Express. Then again, I guess that's not exactly the "TV Worth Watching" Bravo was looking for. The first challenge was to make an outfit with only the furnishings from their new apartment. They could use absolutely anything they found in the apartment and they did, including feathers from the pillows and beading from the chandelier. It was slightly predictable, but I guess it is in the beginning because you can already see who has a clue and who is window dressing. The Harvard MBA (um.. yeah, I don't remember her name and neither will you tomorrow) got kicked off tonight and was up against Jeffrey, the neck tattoo guy who's the next Santino but so far not as entertaining. I believe I read somewhere that they know each other which makes perfect sense. Someone has to be "the bad boy" except Santino did it better and as much as I was a Chloe lover, I would have chosen Santino's collection last season. Honestly, the promos for the rest of the season didn't give much away but for some reason it looks like creepy Vincent will be around for a while longer. I'm looking forward to see what they do with the rest of the season and I hope the personalities come out a little bit more and people fill their roles. I really want to know who gets booted for not playing by the rules. Those crazy fashion designers!!!

I caught a bit of the World Series of Pop Culture again and the category was "Life After Reality." Some of the questions were so freaking easy I couldn't believe that people got them wrong. What I liked most was the names of the two groups: Ronnie, Bobby, Ricky and Mike (let me remind you there are only 3 people on the team) and I Heart Jake Ryan. Priceless. The Boys from New Edition fell short but at least they had a memorable name. Tomorrow its "We're What Willis Was Talking About." Now I'm stuck thinking about what my pop culture team name would be.. I guess I'd have to confer with Sandra since she would surely be my partner in crime. If I could figure out how to post a link I'd link you to her blog... But again, techno moron bordering on imbecile so it might take a little bit longer for me to do so.

I really thought I was on the right track as far as getting painting done tomorrow. The rooms aren't that big so I thought Sarah and I wouldn't have a problem getting the upstairs done. Until I went to teh house and realized the woodwork has yet to be painted, nor has the ceiling in my bedroom. Holy wrench in the works. So, it's going to be a very long day and I'm probably going to wish I was at work instead. Ok, that's a lie but it sounded good. I'm not much of a painter but I think tomorrow will be my crash course. Luckily Sarah is a seasoned pro so we'll see how it goes. I'm really just looking forward to rewarding my hard work with a Wendy's Spicy Chicken Sandwich (plain with cheese) and a haircut. Can't you see I'm a simple girl! Yeah, that's not exactly true either but it sounded good at the time.

Anyway, time for bed. I won't regale you with more than one Chris Daughtry picture today (ok, I tried but it didn't work - I even put one of him with Ed Kowalczyk to up the bald factor) and I tried to post a picture on the bottom of the blog instead of the top but that didnt' really work out so no pictures for you! Just think, it's almost Friday.

American Idol: The aftermath

This picture speaks for itself. Chris Daughtry was a show-stopper. He did not wear leather pants which was a damn shame, but I would have licked the screen if I were not afraid of electrocution (which I am). Let me run it down for you:

Mandisa the queer hater opened the show. I like her, don’t get me wrong. She’s a big girl with an amazing voice, but I really didn’t need God bought into my American Idol experience. Regardless, she was a great way to begin. Her third song turned into a duet between her and Ace, the beanie wearing pretty boy. I’m not a fan. He’s not my type (see: Chris Daughtry). However, chicks dig him, young and old and he really did put on a good performance. He sang songs that really worked with his voice and while he touches himself way too much for me, I was pleasantly surprised. After that was Lisa Tucker whose first song was Signed, Sealed, Delivered. After that I went to the bathroom. Not because she was bad, but because I knew the line would be short and I didn’t mind so much missing part of her performance. She bought “her friend Paris” out for the end of her set and then I had to watch her fake Beyonce, both in voice and dance moves. It kinda looked like kiddie porn (I’m guessing). I never liked her anyway, so it’s not like now I’m going to start to say nice things. Then there was Bucky. What more do I have to say? The kid’s name is Bucky for Christ’s sake! Can’t dance a lick, can only sing slightly better but at least he was entertaining to watch. To continue with our country theme there was Kellie Pickler. OH GOOD GOD Kellie Pickler. She looked like a white-trash drag queen but at least she pronounced Albany correctly (it’s not Al-bany kids.. it’s ALL-bany). She and Bucky were doing a cover of “You’re the One That I Want” from Grease. Train wreck. Absolute train wreck. She was not together with the music (which I will never understand) and she bought Bucky right down with her. I felt bad that it was his last song cause she helped to slaughter it. They got back on track but I was just cringing through the whole thing. She bought us to the needless 30 minute intermission.

I admit, I was breathless with anticipation because I knew it was only Chris, Elliot (or Ethan, as my friend Sue called him) and Taylor left. So, once the hard music came on I was perched at the edge of my seat. Again, no leather pants but still looking gorgeous as ever and singing like there was no tomorrow. Everyone was screaming and I felt a little dirty because the little girl behind me kept yelling “I love you Chris” and I could only think that I love him in such a different way than her. So I believe the first song was Whole Lotta Love by Led Zeppelin and then segued into Wanted: Dead or Alive by Bon Jovi. Finished that up with Renegade and all of them were really great, rocking versions of the originals. He picks up a guitar (note to men: chicks dig guys who can play guitar) and begins to sing “Saving Me” by Nickelback who not only played the Pepsi Arena Monday night but (according to Sue’s brother in law) also frequented the strip club DeCarlo’s with Chris Daughtry on Sunday night. Midway through the first verse Elliot Yamin comes out and I admit, it was a pretty great collaboration. That was Chris’s finale and it was well worth it. I love Elliot but after Chris it was a bit of a letdown because he doesn’t sing songs everyone knows. However, he does have the best voice on the show (in my opinion) and I did enjoy him. Plus, his mom was there and she got a standing ovation from the crowd during intermission. In the spot reserved for Miss Diva herself, Katharine McPhee, Chris, Bucky, Elliot and Ace got together and sang “Patience” by Guns and Roses. It blew me away. They all sounded so perfect together and I really wish there was a way for them to release it on an album cause it was fanfuckingtastic. Finally out comes Taylor Hicks from the back of the arena. He was very high energy and mostly sang songs that earned him the adoration of the fans on American Idol but everyone (even the local reviewers from the paper) agreed that Chris stole the show. He’s just a consummate performer and was so incredibly on point. I will stand in line and wait for that cd to come out, I promise you that.

Anyway, the concert was much better than I had anticipated and it was also entertaining to watch middle aged women throw themselves at people half their age in the name of music. I swear, the whole front row was moms fighting with their children to get a piece of Ace (I couldn’t help it - it was just too easy).

I know, I’ve been consumed and I almost apologize. The American League pulled out a win in the All Star Game last night thanks to a stellar performance from Michael Young (um.. who?) Good for him. I guess he’s a second baseman. What can I say? If it’s not B-Rob on second I’m really not paying attention. Plus, I only saw highlights so I can’t really wax poetic about “what a game!” 41-49 at the break and I believe we’ll be seeing said Mr. Young the next few days so let’s see what we can do to start things off with a bang (and I’m not talking about players banging into each other, although that’s pretty much bound to happen too).

Finally, Project Runway debuts tonight and I can’t freaking wait. 9:00 is the casting special with Tim Gunn (Make it work!) and I guess we’re gonna hear what many of the key players from the first two seasons are (or in some cases aren’t) up to. I will be glued to the TV from 9-11 regardless of the painting or laundry that has to be done. I will try to give my critique tonight but it’s the first night I’ve had nothing to do in about a week so I might not be able to stay up much past 11 to post. Patience is a virtue kids.

Happy Hump Day

Sometimes there are days...

you know you should have just stayed in bed. As I was drying off after my shower this morning I felt an itch on my foot. When I looked down, I found a mouse running over it. That is never a good way to start the day. I bolted from the bathroom (I wish I always ran that fast), hurling obscenities to find my sister and father laughing their ass off at me. Then I’m pretty sure my Dad beat it to death. I didn’t stick around to find out.

Someone has to explain to me why I’m not currently on The World Series of Pop Culture on Vh1. Seriously. Ok, it may be because I would have trouble finding two other people to compete with me. I’m doing pretty well on my own though.

Saturday at Camden Yards is Brian Roberts bobblehead doll day. Considering I’m doing everything I can to get to Eryn’s bonfire/birthday party, I’m thinking she should go on Ebay to get me one. I don’t see that happening, but it sounds like a good idea to me. I’m pretty sure someone will decide to sell theirs and I hope to snap one up. I doubt I’ll get down to get the Brian Roberts growth poster (I think I’m a tad too old for it) so I’ll take what I can get. Speaking of Orioles, Ed Rogers (he of the peekaboo baseball) was sent down today. What a way to start off the All Star Break by making room for someone who can hopefully.. well.. find the ball. Unfortunately, Miggy didn’t really make a dent in the Home Run Derby so let’s take a moment instead to dwell on his fantastic efforts in 2004.


OK, time’s up. Ryan Howard beat David Wright in the final round. I think Wright might have shot his load a little early. I was able to watch his first round and he did kill it. Sorry David – it’s all about longevity and in this case, in more ways than one. Hopefully the AL can pull it out tomorrow night for home field advantage.

My bedspread came in. I’m not happy. I wonder if this is one of those times where you should just go with your gut feeling. It’s not that I don’t like it, but it’s a tad darker than it looked online. I plan to wait until the room is painted to decide if it’s good or not so I’ll keep you posted. Speaking of which, I’m thinking of banging out of work one day this week (more than likely Thursday) to get some painting done so again, I do not disappoint Eryn. The things I do for that girl.. hee hee. Oh well, I still have the lamp.

It’s a good thing Lynn’s wedding was this past weekend because I think my legs had a target on them when this one kid was up. It didn’t matter where I played, he nailed it at me, and hard. If only I could have fielded the ball. At all. Bad hops. Lots of bad hops and lots of bad calls, which actually lost us the game. We got a guy out on third and he went back to the bench but the umpire never called him out so instead of getting the third out of the inning, he went back to the bag and the next guy hit a grand slam. We lost by 1. Complete bullshit but what are you gonna do? It’s a game.

2 more days till Project Runway. I can’t wait. I initially got hooked on the show when I caught the tail end (ok, 4 or 5 hours) of the first season on Bravo and there was a marathon on yesterday. Imagine the motivation it took for me to leave the house and play my ball game!

Tomorrow is the American Idol concert. As embarrassing as it may be, I’m kind of excited about it. Ok I won’t lie, I’m pretty excited about the prospect of Chris Daughtry in leather pants and I’m almost glad that diva/bulimic Katharine McPhee won’t be there. I wasn’t a big fan of her anyway. Granted, I think it’s shitty that she thinks it’s ok to not come to the first three weeks of the show (bronchitis my ass) but I’m sure it’ll still be entertaining.

Still beat and unfortunately, not many interesting things have happened the past two days so I’m afraid you all have to suffer. Hopefully more entertainment to come in the near future.

Now THAT was a wedding!

Wow! What a great time we had yesterday. Igot my hair and makeup done, had a manicure and a pedicure (I don't think I'm going to wait for another wedding to get my next one - nothing beats being pampered) and then was rip roaring to go! Everyone looked amazing and the reception was a blast. There was karaoke and lots of dancing. My legs still feel like Jell-O, but in a good way. I think we made some new friends with Lynn's fabulous bridesmaids and I admit, I was a bit of a camera slut. I think I got a picture with the husband of every bridesmaid, but it was all in good fun and that is exactly what we had. I met my non-veggie eating soulmate, Ryan, but unfortunatley he's married to the Matron of Honor. Just my luck! ha ha.. Lynn looked beautiful and I'd like to personally thank her for the flip flops she got for the bridesmaids. The best thing she could have done and we all appreciated it! The wedding has kind of consumed the weekend but in a good way! If you didn't have a good time at that wedding it was because you didn't want to!

Got up around 10:30 and actually made it to the brunch this morning which was nice and unexpected. Nothing cures a hangover like a big honking pile of greasy breakfast food! Had to play ball this afternoon and it could NOT have been hotter. I had to catch and I think I sweated out every single bad toxin that was in my body. I'll tell ya - my reflexes were pretty off today so I think I'm glad all I did was catch. Even gatorade wasn't helping me so after the game I decided to try a little hair of the dog. I was really jonesing for a spicy chicken sandwich from Wendy's but I worked with what I had - Ronny's cheeseburgers and along with the beer, they really hit the spot. I can't believe I could actually drink beer today but I think it was just because the beer was so cold and it was so damn hot outside. I just got hom ea little while ago and I'm extremely exhausted. I plan to spend the rest of my night putting the bazillion pictures I took yesterday onto Shutterfly but I hate to disappoint so I figured I'd try to post a little something for my legions of fans.

O's pulled it out today against Cleveland 5-4. If you can believe it, Javy Lopez went 3 for 4. Maybe we'll go on a tear after the All Star Break. Hey, a girl can dream! Time for me to get my shit together for tomorrow because there's another ball game to be had. Hope everyone had a great weekend.

There is a God...

and he might just be a closeted Oriole fan. Luis Matos has been designated for reassignment. You can almost hear the sigh of relief from Oriole fans all over the country. That’s not to say that the guy they’re bringing in to replace him will do anything phenomenal (I’m pretty sure he won’t) but we’ll give him a shot. I mean, what are the chances that another guy will lose the ball in his jersey, right? RIGHT?

Bored out of my f’n mind. I’m leaving early today because of the rehearsal dinner and I might even try to get a final tan in because I’m a little concerned about tanning the day of the wedding. I’m getting my eyebrows waxed that morning and I’m already afraid I’ll have freaky red rings around my eyes so to accentuate them with fake sun is probably not a great idea. I really need a sugar daddy cause this working shit is getting old. REAL old. I’m probably just having a reaction to this beautiful summer weather we’ve been having. Add on to that the multitude of things I could be doing at the house and my brain is sort of fried. Perhaps once I get through this weekend I’ll be alright. Although I do have the American Idol concert to go to on Tuesday night and while I don’t have the McPheever, I’ll be a little peeved if she can’t suck it up and perform. You’re not a star yet, honey so don’t pull this shit. In all honesty, I could care less as long as Chris Daughtry wears leather pants and sings me some Live. My bald man fetish will live on through him.

Not much has gone on today so I apologize. Let’s see what I can pull out of my ass: Kathy Griffin is saying that her husband Matt has basically laundered $72,000 from her. Matt - you married Kathy Griffin… you’re gonna get skewered on the stand up circuit so I hope you have a really thick skin. God I can’t wait to hear what she has to say in two and a half months when she comes to town. Have I mentioned I’m going to see Kathy Griffin? Yeah, I thought I might have.

I have two new favorite web sites: www.gofugyourself.com and www.realityblurred.com. I have been amused by them all week. I actually found this list of 100 best entertainment web sites in Entertainment Weekly and I just remembered these two off the top of my head. I need to go back and read them all cause I can only imagine the distractions I could come up with. If you like fashion or reality TV, be sure to check them out.

Pirates of the Caribbean 2 opens today. I didn’t see the first one yet so I will not be seeing it this weekend or any other weekend because some of us girls from work are going to go on July 19th. Plus, I need to see the first one before I see the second one. I’m anal like that. I’ve never been a big Johnny Depp fan and since I’m scared of anything Willy Wonka, he had to suffer. I don’t know, I wasn’t even a “21 Jump Street” Johnny Depp fan but everyone has raved about how great these movies are so as a self proclaimed movie buff, I’m going to give him a shot. Just not this weekend. I have a feeling he’ll survive without my paltry $7.00 (God it’s good to live in a small town when it comes to movie ticket prices).

Perhaps I’ll have more later but if not, have a great weekend cause I have a feeling I’ll be spending most of mine in a pretty dress and beer induced coma.

The longest day ever

I considered walking in front of a bus so I'd have to go to the hospital and not back to work, but Lynn might kill me if I missed her wedding. Instead, I figured I’d better try to post sometime today considering I have a ball game tonight and have been sleeping pretty shitty. I have a feeling I won’t sleep much this weekend so I might as well catch up on it while I can.

First off, The Devil Wears Prada: Great movie. I really liked it and I never once wondered when it was going to be over, which is pretty much key for me. Now, I haven’t read the book in quite a while but from what I can recall there were TONS of changes made, and that bothers me. Also, the book (as usual) is better than the movie. There was more backstory in the book and I think it was necessary. Plus, there were such strange things they changed. I mean, does it really matter what the boyfriend’s name was? No, so why change it? Regardless of my nitpicking, I really enjoyed the movie. Meryl Streep was absolutely amazing and I’m almost convinced that Adrian Grenier has a soul. It was nice to see Daniel Sunjata from Rescue Me (even if he was fully clothed) but I wish his part had been more central to the character, like it was in the book. That man deserves way more screen time, even if it’s just to look at his well chiseled face… yeah.. his face.

Not much to say about the O’s. Dropped a game 4-2 last night and Markakis is taking a break thanks to some pain in his calf. He’ll have an MRI today to rule anything out but it looks like it could be a minor strain. The All Star break couldn’t come any sooner! 4 more hours left to vote for Ramon, who is more than worthy of representing at the All-Star Break, sore knee and all. However, it’s more than likely that the spot will go to A.J. Pierzynski. I don’t know if I spelled that right although I do think they’ll take away my “Polack” card if I didn’t. Anyway, Adam Loewen is doing well in AAA and hopefully will be able to come up soon, along with Hayden Penn who has hopefully recovered from his nasty appendicitis attack. It can’t get any worse, am I right?

Last night I caught “So You Think You Can Dance.” I know, after last week’s dance recital rant you would think I’d be watching it religiously. However, it debuted literally the day after American Idol and I just couldn’t commit to something like I had with Idol. Plus, I had already had my heart broken thanks to the early exit of Chris Daughtry and I just couldn’t do that to myself again. Well, I admit I’m sorry I missed it. It was pretty entertaining and for the most part, I agreed with the judges. It’s pretty interesting to watch these people from all different genres try to learn something new and look professional doing it, even when they don’t have a clue. I don’t have a favorite as of yet because I haven’t seen a full show yet (and won’t because I have a ball game tonight and my Tivo won’t be hooked up until we move into the house) but I’ll try to update you more on that when I’m able to commit to it.

Emmy nominations: I’m disappointed in that Jason Lee didn’t get nominated for “My Name is Earl.” Kevin James?! Come on Academy!! However, I will give the Academy props because who would have ever thought Jaime Pressly would get nominated for anything more than Cow Pie Queen at the local fair? (that was a compliment… kinda) Seriously though, she cracks me up on Earl and I would love to see her win. I would also really love for Jeremy Piven to win cause we all know I have a strange adoration for him going back to PCU and beyond. I always have a soft spot in my heart for the douchebags and Ari Gold is their King. I never got into Arrested Development so I can’t root for any of those people, especially since I think they took nominations away from some more deserving people on The Office (again, showing a little love for the Poles, John Krasinski). It was nice NOT to see domination by the Sopranos (perhaps due to such an awful season) and Desperate Housewives and to give some last minute chances to Six Feet Under, which is still one of the greatest shows ever made, in my humble opinion. And finally, Grey’s Anatomy. That’s my new Six Feet Under and I only hope Tivo gets hooked up before the new season starts on its new night and that it survives. Guess we’ll have to wait until August 27th for the winners and the fashions.

My email quotes at this moment in time are from the movie “Beautiful Girls.” If you haven’t seen it, please see it just for Rosie O’Donnell’s rant on what men think of beauty. Priceless. It’s also one of the first times you see Natalie Portman and it really bothers me that this girl never went through an awkward stage. She’s downright beautiful even as a pre-teen. This is one of those movies I can watch a million times and though I own it on DVD, I’ll still stay up late to watch it if it’s on HBO. Tons of great quotes and this is today’s:

Andera: You know there are fours words I need to hear before I go to sleep. Four little words. "Good night sweet girl." That's all it takes. I'm easy, I know, but a guy who can muster up those four words is a guy I want to stay with.

Brilliant.

Finally, I have a little something to get off my chest. Every day I drive by this adorable old man walking his dog. It makes me smile every single morning because you can just tell how much he cares about this dog just by the smile he has on his face walking it, no matter what the weather. That’s all great, but what bothers me is that he walks the dog and has the dog on the side where the cars are. I mean, am I wrong in saying that the man should be the one by the cars in case (god forbid) anything happened? Would you put your kid in that position? I think not. It’s an incredibly busy road and it’s crazy during the morning and afternoon commute. I have been thinking about this for days and it’s just bothered me. That’s what you get for clicking on my soapbox! Have a great rest of the day.

I've changed my mind

I'm a woman. It's my prerogative. Ok, it's Bobby Brown's and Britney Spear's too.. but Bobby did it better. Hell to the YES! I changed my mind and bought the bedspread you see next to you. It matches the lamp, the lampshade is also striped (which is so against everything I stand for, but I'm trying to get over it) and the colors match perfectly.

Tre and Danny painted some of the ceilings today and the cabinets (well, some of them) have been repainted and I have to admit, they really look nice. They'll look great with the black appliances, knobs and hinges. Things are going well. Really all we have left is painting and Tre and Dad need to put the floors down and do a bit of sheetrocking in the living room. I'm sure Tre and I will be a tad more cautious in her house than we were for the infamous "sex toy party aftermath" in which her ass went through the sheetrock. It's not my fault she doesn't know how to get low (Thanks to my college rugby coach, Nick, for teaching me how to get down)!

I'm very excited because I'm FINALLY going to see The Devil Wears Prada tonight. I had to beg and plead but my sister has agreed to go with me. Danny called me to see if I would consider going to a more boy-friendly movie but I had been looking forward to it all day and really, the rest of the movies playing were not ones I was interested in. I mean, I do want to see Nacho Libre but that could be a rental and Superman Returns doesn't start till 9:30 and won't get out till after midnight. I don't have the energy for that long a movie tonight and I know my sister won't. So, I doubt I'll have a chance to post after the movie but I promise to let you know what i thought of it tomorrow. At this point it better be amazing because I've certainly yped it up more than necessary on this blog!

I've been reading some of the boys blogs regarding the Orioles and they are talking about maybe acquiring Mark Texiera. I like him. I'd be more than willing to give away Luis Matos, Ed Rogers, Rodrigo Lopez and Bruce Chen just for him. Hell, I'll even throw in Conine if I can keep Miggy and Javy. Again, I'm a girl and that is one stellar ass. Throw me a bone here. Game just started so I don't have any scores to share with you.

Big Brother starts up tonight with its All Star edition. Again, when are reality stars going to get over their 15 minutes and get real god damn jobs?! So anyway, the cast list has been leaked onto the internet and the usual suspects (or at the least the ones that will more than likely cause the most drama) have made the show. I have always liked Big Brother but I never got into it more than when I was in Australia. I think I watched it religiously for the week I was there and was totally addicted, so much so that I used to check the website and read the updates every single day. I will not be as involved in this one. I think it's just that it's on so damn often and I'm not home that much in the summer (contrary to the insane social life I've displayed in this blog)!

I think my guiltiest pleasure in life is Dog the Bounty Hunter. I have no excuse for it, nor do I intend to make any. I love the white trashiness of the show but that they really do work hard at what they do and help people, probably even the ones that don't deserve their help. Like I said, no excuse. A week from today is the beginning of Project Runway. God, I can't wait. It's like crack to me which is really interesting because it's not like I've ever been into fashion or can even sew a button on a shirt. I guess it just amazes me what people can create with their own two hands. Let's keep going on the guilty pleasures: The Girls Next Door. I'm sure everything about it is wrong but Holly's completely uncomprehensible adoration of Hef (her baby puffin - I still haven't figured out if that's a compliment), Bridget's friendliness and Kendra's complete blonde moments just crack me up and I can't help but watch. I don't think anyone was happier than me when they got that Playboy cover last year.. Again.. I can just feel the eye rolls and yes, the guilt is certainly there but still no excuses. I can't even make one up. Yeah, I think I'm done on that note. I've embarassed myself enough.

Yep, I'm a loser

But in all honesty, I’m ok with it. Granted, it’s the 4th of July and I should probably be out partying or something, but I have to work tomorrow. The majority of my friends are teachers and no longer have to work so I get the shit end of the stick. Yeah, I know. I picked my profession and I obviously did it poorly. However, if I had been a teacher I’d probably already be in jail for hitting some little shit who got smart with me. I don’t like younger guys all that much so there’s not much of a Mary Kay Letorneau allure for me, so I’m guessing I’d be in jail for assault instead. Therefore, I spent my day watching the Project Runway marathon (Santino doing a Tim Gunn impression will never get old), doing laundry and switching purses. Oh yeah. I know you’re all wishing you were me.

The O’s got their ass kicked today, but my boyfriend Nick Markakis has really been turning it on. I think my friend Anthony (Toine) in Atlanta really did tell him that I was willing to drive down and have my way with him in the dugout tunnel because that boy sure has been on a tear!!! I’ve been reading on all these other blogs about people begging for him to go down to AAA and that he came up too soon, blah blah blah. Sure, it’s only been a few games of excellence but at least it shows the boy does have potential and he certainly deserves to be in the majors. Would he be there if he were playing for the Yanks or Red Sox? Probably not, but isn’t that why we’re Oriole fans? We love giving some Joe Schmo a shot cause he just might turn into greatness. I mean, who thought a tall, skinny drink of water like Cal Ripken could play shortshop, right? Let’s give the kid a shot and a break.

To make my night even more entertaining I’m now watching Kathy Griffin: Strong Black Woman. Ordered my tickets for her show in September and I can’t wait! I know a lot of people don’t think she’s funny but I love the fact that she skewers celebrities because if I had a stand up career, that is so what I’d do. Hell, I do that now I just don’t get paid for it! I mean, I don’t know if you’ve seen her show but I’d take her “D-list” house any day!

So, let me give you the house lowdown: I spent yesterday painting the kitchen cabinets and I also primed the upstairs bathroom. Thing is, I had to prime it in this light pink color (ok, it looks like pepto so if you come into the house understand that it’s the primer, not the actual color) because the color I chose (frosted pomegranate) is a darker, cranberry (or pomegranatey) pink and if I didn’t prime it that color it’d be really pink. Now, if you go upstairs in the house when it’s painted you’ll see a theme of pink but I didn’t want it to be Barbie Pink. More of an adult pink (although the Barbie pink was hell getting out of my hair)! Anyway, I got out of work early, went straight to the house and started painting the cabinets and then this morning I painted the wainscoating which is a HUGE pain in the ass because you have to get in all the little crevices and it was slightly slow going. I then go upstairs and start priming the two upstairs rooms (my hands are still white and I literally scrubbed myself raw) and all is well. I’m proud that I’ve accomplished so much in the little time I have and life is good. So, earlier that day, my mother, sister and I had a debate about what color appliances to get. Tre wants black but the cabinets are brown so my mom and I thought stainless steel would look nicer. We have yet to go get the appliances, so no big deal. I come downstairs after priming and my mother tells me they decided to repaint the cabinets (that I had spent forfuckingever on) in a gray color. So, the color we had originally painted then was called Yorkshire Brown, but when you put it all together on the Behr web site it looked gray and it looked really nice. So really, the Behr web site screwed my sister cause the coloring was off, but I’ve already told them I’ve done all I’m going to do in the kitchen. It’s not like I know how to use it anyway, am I right? Anyway, the floors are sanded and tomorrow I think Tre is going to paint the ceilings. I guess then we’ll do all the painting and finally, the floors. The beer, pizza and painting parties will be coming up over the next few weeks so reserve your spots now! Isn’t it nice to help your friends accomplish goals? I thought so!

Anyway, not much else going on. I have to get my dress re-altered tomorrow morning before I go to work and still have to use my lunch to go to the mall and buy a bra, headband and spanx. Shoot, that reminds me that I need to research spanx. I think I’m a little confused as to what they are and what they’re supposed to do and I really don’t have any time for that because my lunch is only an hour and I’ve only figured out one way to sneak out of the office when I’m thinking I might be a few minutes late. I’ve gotta work on that. I’m trying to find a bedspread and I found one that matches my colors perfectly (see the posted picture), but it’s printed and since my lampshade is striped I’m having some issues with having a printed bedspread. Jesus Christ I’m anal. Time for me to figure out what I’m wearing tomorrow and do some reading. I’m only about 10 pages into Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marquez but I’ll keep you posted when I know more. It’s pretty good so far. Happy 4th to all!!!!

PS – STILL haven’t seen The Devil Wears Prada. Not happy.