Just a quickie

I've been saying that I would post pictures for the last week or so but things have been pretty crazy in the last couple of weeks. So, here is a picture of me, Tre, Jen and Fish at our first bar stop on our way to Yankee Stadium on mine and Tre's birthday. Next to that, I've posted a picture of me, Tre and the heckler that I managed to befriend with my feminine wiles.... or my boobs. Whatever.

How come every time you come around....

Well, it’s official. The Orioles have turned against me. I mean, they take two of three from the Yankees, yet can’t win when I’m at Yankee Stadium to celebrate my 30th birthday. What have I done to deserve that? Granted, I haven’t been the most optimistic fan of late, but I can’t be the only one! I acknowledge the bright spots (Nick Markakis, Corey Patterson, etc.) but in doing so it’s only right for me to show my utter disdain for the rest (the bullpen, Peter Angelos, etc.). So, come back to me my Oriole friends. Don’t make me cover that tattoo with the ancient Chinese symbol for victory. Granted, I don’t know what that symbol is and one tattoo is enough for me so really it’s just an empty threat, but it made me feel good to make it. Regardless of our issues, my boys DID pull out two wins against the Yanks and I couldn’t be prouder. Although, there’s an ass whooping just waiting for LaTroy Hawkins cause everything was going fine Tuesday night until he came in. However, I’m not one to blame so we’ll let that go.

Remember the tiredness of yesterday’s post? Yeah, not over it yet. J. came over and we watched Shaun of the Dead. It was pretty funny and an entertaining spoof on the zombie genre. I had caught a bit of it last week on HBO so I was glad he bought it down with him and I got the opportunity to watch the whole thing. He also bought down Team America: World Police so I’m going to try to watch that this weekend also. Tonight I plan on having birthday cake with my parents, doing some laundry, maybe painting my toenails and getting a well deserved full night of sleep! Luckily, I’m pretty confident that the alarm clock is going to work (I’ve almost figured it out) so I’ve been able to sleep a tad more sound since last week.

I did NOT get to watch Project Runway but I did hear that Allison got booted and that upset me. I mean, Robert sucks it up two weeks in a row and gets saved both times. Angela and Vincent are train wrecks yet keep pushing forward. Allison has one off week (and seriously, everything else she’s done has been lauded as nothing short of fantastic) and she’s gone. I really thought she was going to make it pretty far. I also heard that Laura’s been a bit of a uberbitch this episode and I can’t wait to see it. Granted, her freakish body type and flapper like style irritate me, but it’s pretty much a given that I’m gonna root for the bitch. I just always thought it’d be Keith and not Laura!

Check the blog, kids. I called it! Benji won Dancing with the Stars and Travis came in second. He really is a talented guy and I’m sure he’ll be dancing with Celine for some time to come. I’m kind of intrigued to see the tour but I’m afraid I didn’t get tickets when they went on sale so I won’t be attending. A couple people from work will be going so I’m sure they’ll let me know what it was like. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a dance “concert” (besides Riverdance) so I’m curious as to how it’ll be staged and all that jazz. I think Benji was the perfect choice considering the prize, but I have a feeling there’ll be bigger things in his future.

This has most certainly been the longest week of my life. Isn’t it always like that when you have a day off in there somewhere? I considered banging in late this morning cause I was still exhausted. So overtired that I really couldn’t sleep. But I took one for the team and decided to come in. God knows I couldn’t have missed the 4 pm fire drill. I really should have taken all my stuff with me and just snuck off as everyone was going back into the building but I’m not ballsy enough (believe it or not).

I believe tonight ABC is airing the Super Bowl editions of Grey’s Anatomy. I’m a huge fan of the show, but damned if I can remember what those episodes are. I know they were a two parter and I’m assuming it’s the one where the guy had the bomb stuck in his chest cavity, but I’m not sure. If that’s the case, that WAS a good episode and if I can stay awake long enough, I’ll certainly be watching it. I’m still not happy about this whole move to Thursday for Grey’s. They were the cornerstone of my Sunday night. I mean, I’m almost ALWAYS home on Sunday. Thursday: not so much.

I spent today listening to Yahoo! Music instead of my Ipod cause I really need to change the songs on it and I’m getting bored with the same shit over and over again. So, I’m going to take this opportunity to wax poetic about the newest releases:

Justin Timberlake: Sexyback - The song doesn’t sound a bit like him, but I think it’s got a great beat and I jam to it every time it’s on. When someone asks me what I’m doing tonight I’ve taken the liberty of saying “I’m bringing sexy back.”
Fergie: London Bride - I don’t hate a band more than the Black Eyed Peas. I don’t know why, I just do. But this song is a catchy little ditty and as much as I didn’t want to I found myself wanting to go down like London Bridge.
Paris Hilton: Stars Are Blind - I can’t listen to this song. It goes against everything I stand for. 1) it’s Paris Hilton and 2) I always think it’s “The Tide is High” by Blondie and then I’m even more disappointed when I realize I gave it a chance.
Gnarls Barkley: Crazy - The first time I heard this song I liked it. That rarely happens to me. Most of the time songs have to grow on me until I find myself not able to get it out of my head, much like the original cast recording of Rent. Today I heard their cover of Gone Daddy Gone and that was pretty awesome too. What can I say? I dig the Gnarls Barkley. I mean, great song and great name. What more could a girl ask for?
Evanescence: Call Me When You’re Sober - Nuff said. It should be every girl’s theme song.

Tomorrow’s Friday. Oh Happy Day!

Inter-species Erotica

I know it’s wrong, but I’m too exhausted to work. I even tried to take a cat nap in the ladies room, but it wasn’t as comfortable as one would think. Let me explain:

I had taken Friday off to prepare for the party and just get the house ready. We set up chairs, tables, decorated a slight bit and cleaned the interior of the house as best we could. I mean, what’s the point? People were going to be trudging through all day anyway so why waste my energy? I got a call from J. on Friday night so I went up to hang with him. We watched Hackers, my choice and one of my faves. What can I say? I have a soft spot in my heart for Angelina Jolie before all the hype. Anyway, no details for the masses, but things are going pretty well. We discussed the smoking thing and he’s gone to great lengths to not to it around me, if at all. I can deal with that for now. So, I got home kinda late Friday night and had to be up to get to my haircut by 9:30 Saturday morning. The rest of the day was spent preparing for the party and (believe it or not) COOKING! I made my mother’s homemade macaroni and cheese and it wasn’t that bad. I think I did quite good! I got compliments on it and if people only told me it was good because it was my birthday, well that’s fine too! Anyway, Saturday was the party and I think it was a great success. It was great to see some of my friends who aren’t local be able to make it (you know who you are) and have a good time! I can’t say I felt fabulous when the chimney people came to do some work around 11 on Saturday morning, but I wasn’t feeling terrible! Or so I thought. We did a lot of cleaning (and there is still cleaning to be done…. maybe tomorrow) and then I had to get out of the house to go to my ball game. I know, I’m glutton for punishment. So, it’s a beautiful day.. I’m sweating out alcohol and I had just eaten Wendy’s because it’s SUPPOSED to make me feel better. Yeah… I’m catching and halfway through the game I feel like that guy in Alien who has the thing come through his stomach. Not good. I manage to make it through the game and just want to go home and go to sleep but alas, J. calls to see if I want to come over and hang out. You all remember that honeymoon phase of the relationship where you’re afraid if you say no they’ll forget about you? Yeah… that’s where we are. So, I went home, took a shower and made it to his place by about 9ish… I got home around 1. Then got up to work on Monday. Oh no, it’s not over!

Monday night we went to see Clerks II (hence, the title of this post). HYSTERICAL! I love me some Kevin Smith and this movie is a noble bow to the first movie. You didn’t need to see the first one to like it, but it would help you to get some of the inside jokes. Two words: pillow pants. See the movie, read this blog again, and laugh your ass off. His wife is a terrible actress so she better never leave him cause I doubt she’ll get another job anywhere, unless it’s in the View Askewniverse. So I didn’t get home till 11 that night and had to get up early on Tuesday morning. I only worked from 8-12 because yesterday me, my sister and two of our friends went to the Yankee-Orioles game for mine and Tre’s birthday (which was yesterday - we’re 30 - oh good god). So, we left around 2 and had some road sodas.. then hit all the bars from our parking garage to the bleachers. We got in the bleachers and we were in the “family” section. Probably not a good idea. So, Tre, Jen and some douchebag Tre met go to see if they can get in the drinking section. Well, I had to go to the bathroom so when I come out, Jen tells me to stand where I am. This is because she managed to bribe an usher to let us into the drinking section. $5 per person later and there we are.. beers in hand. It’s not over though. This guy also got us seats right behind the foul pole in right field which was way better than our crowded seats out in center field. So, I got heckled by a Yankee fan who wouldn’t let me go to the bathroom, but when I got back I put him in a headlock (which he seemed to like) and harassed me in a funny way the whole game. It was fun! Thanks to the O’s bullpen (as usual) we lost 6-3 regardless of the solid outing from Erik Bedard. So, last night we didn’t get home until about 1:15 and I had to get up for work at 6:45. Since my alarm clock isn’t necessarily working quite the way I’d hoped (or at least I’m not sure how to make it work) I was kinda sleeping with one ear open anyway so I slept like shit. I made it to work, bloodshot eyes and all and thought everything was going ok. That is, until we went to lunch at our favorite diner. It’s a beautiful day so we sat outside and I had a cheese omelet. YUMMY! About an hour and a half after that, I get called by my friend Lacey and I walk into the kitchen to find everyone getting ready to have cake for my birthday. Lacey (good listener that she is) got me a cheesecake which was scrumptious, but now I’m languishing in the most obscene food coma the world has ever witnessed. One more hour here and I don’t know how I’ll deal. That, and tonight is our last regular season ball game. I might die. Oh yeah, and J. is coming down to watch a movie tonight… or watch me sleep cause that’s more than likely what will happen. Poor guy. So, luckily the minute he leaves I can go to sleep instead of drive home. That’s a plus, right?

So, there’s your explanation. A little compassion please!

The finale of So You Think You Can Dance is on tonight and they will finally unveil the winner of the prime spot in Celine Dion’s Vegas extravaganza.! I’m curious as to who’s going to win because I think everyone but Donyelle is worthy. Honestly, I think it’ll be Benji. I think he and Celine would get along tres magnifique! Tonight is also another episode of Project Runway and the cattiness is coming out. I wish I had more to say but my brain is like Bradley’s outfit from last week: shiny, but not worth much.

Thanks for being patient with me and hopefully I’ll be back on track after a night or two of sleep! Happy Hump Day!

The time has come, the walrus said

First night was a success. As you can see from the picture, my curtains came in and while they’re not quite what I thought they were, they are pretty and will do the job. I unpacked every single box that I had to unpack for the upstairs, although I’m a tad perturbed because I still haven’t been able to find my tap shoes. I don’t know where they could have gone. I don’t know if you can adequately see my new clock radio but it’s supposed to be able to wake you up to your Ipod. The directions were great as far as setting the alarm time, but not so much for setting the actual alarm. Therefore, it didn’t work this morning but I think it might have been my fault because I had my Ipod on hold. It’s nice to use it as a charging dock regardless. We’ll have to see if me and my electronically challenged mind can figure it out. This room is bigger than anything I’ve ever had so I’m not used to having that much space to move around in. It’s gonna take some getting used to. LOVE my new bed spread and the lamp is a smashing success. Thanks to everyone who’s helped us out, be it painting, scraping or just plain bringing beer!

I got to see just a smidge of So You Think You Can Dance and while I find it creepy when Heidi and Benji dance together, their final number was a showstopper. I have absolutely no idea who will win, but it won’t be Donyelle. She’s just not strong enough and when she dances next to Heidi she pales in comparison. I think Travis and Benji are kind of evenly matched, but there’s something about Benji that makes me think he’ll win the whole shooting match. Unfortunately, we have to stay tuned until next week to find out who the big winner (cause there’s only one - thanks Katie) will be!

As for winners, your Last Comic Standing is Josh Blue. What the fuck is wrong with you America? I get it, he has cerebral palsy and we feel bad for him. Yes, he’s funny, but I really didn’t America had that much compassion to name him the winner. In all honesty, I don’t find him funny at all and never thought he was gonna make it through the first round. Whatever, in a year or so no one’s gonna remember his name anyway (I watched LCS religiously and I barely remember what the last winner’s name was). I remember the names of lots of the comedians that were on it last season, but I drew a blank on the winner (John Heffron) for a good ten minutes. So, welcome to your future Josh Blue, and congrats! In more reality TV news, Theo of Road Rules and MTV Challenges fame, won the online competition. I was hoping he would win, mainly because he always made me laugh during the challenges with his sarcastic and sometimes nonsensical wit. So, congrats to him too. Maybe now he can get an almost real career and stop competing on those damn challenges (which glue me to my TV screen every week - damn you MTV).

It’s Project Runway day: Bradley has finally met his maker, as he probably should have weeks ago. The job was to update a fashion icon. Bradley got Cher. Do you have any idea what that means? He could have sent his model down the runway in pasties and a cork and Michael Kors would have praised it as something Cher definitely would have worn. Ok.. maybe Vera Wang would have, but you get my point. Instead he sends her down in some lame alien looking shirt and white pants. Um… no. Robert was once again in the bottom two for being boring. It was so boring that I don’t even remember what icon he had. The winner did not get immunity this week and I believe that’s because there was a twist this week in that the models got to choose the designer AND the icon. I thought for sure that Kayne was gonna win, but turns out they chose Michael’s nod to Pam Grier. Both designs were impressive and it figures Michael won on the non-immunity week. Maybe because Kayne already won for the Miss USA dress. I don’t know. Anyway, Laura is becoming a bit of a crusty bitch and I’m so digging it. It’s like Angela is the smelly kid in the class and everyone picks on her. God is she ever gonna rub it in their faces if she gets further than any of them. I’m still gunning for Allison and Uli in the top 3 but I’ve yet to figure out my third choice. Probably who ever shows the most snark factor and right now it might be between Jeffrey and Laura, or as Keith called her (RIP Keith - who’s definitely gay btw), Mean Mommy. I LOVE IT! Viva la Project Runway!

So, breakups are the thing in Hollywood these days. MTV is 3 for 3 with their “love themed” reality shows as Travis Barker of Blink 182 and Shanna Moakler have called it quits. I’m pretty surprised by this one, only because they were always so on top of each other and professed their love by the minute, so it seems. Perhaps that is the kiss of death. I’m now going to continue my search for the perfect man: Not a drop of PDA and completely noncommittal. Yep, that’s my guy. I don’t know, there was something so wrong about their relationship (looks wise) that I really thought it was going to work. I was surprised to find out what a sap he is and perhaps after watching the show, he won’t have much trouble finding another woman, despite the baggage. Maybe now poor little Atiana will get some attention from someone other than her nanny. I mean, am I the only one that felt bad for her? Once the new baby came it was like that kid didn’t exist. Also in reality TV world: LC of Laguna Beach and The Hills finally called it quits with her crackhead, half retarded boyfriend Jason. I really hope that whole internship in Paris thing was a crock of shit or else she must be throwing herself off a bridge right now. Not to be outdone, Kristin Cavallari and Brody Jenner have gone their separate ways. Who? My point exactly.

Couple more hours to waste before I can hightail it to the ball game, my first one in what seems like weeks! Like I needed help playing like Chuck Knoblauch! In baseball news, ex-Yankee Ricky Ledee was traded to the Mets. I saw him play in his first game ever against the Orioles. He’s an ugly mother fucker but I like him just the same. The O’s lost another one yesterday and today is an off day. Two monstrous series are coming up: Boston this weekend, and the Yanks during the week (at which I will be present on Tuesday the 15th). I think it’s only right that the O’s wipe the floor with the Sox on Saturday since technically it’s my birthday party and then they should kick some Yankee ass on Tuesday since it’s my birthday. All in favor?

Anyway, I should do some work today, although I’ve been pretty good at making myself look busy. Today is my Friday as I have tomorrow off to get some house stuff done and prepare for Nytropalooza. I’m sure pictures will be forthcoming. If I don’t get a chance to blog, have a great weekend!!!

I'm too tired to think of a witty title

I wish I had something to write, but I really don’t. I’ve spent the last two nights coming home from work, packing, then going to the house and unpacking. I’m pretty happy with the way things look and I can’t wait to get in. I loathe moving. I mean, it’s not like anyone really enjoys moving but I’m bad at it. I’m your stereotypical girl. I have absolutely no muscle therefore, am no real help. So, I prefer to clean and organize. Tomorrow the kitchen floor is going in and so is the rest of our stuff. Preferably before I get home from work. I know, it’s an awful attitude to take but I can guarantee it’s best for everyone.

Another update: I’ve talked to J. a few times via email and phone and things are going relatively well. We did decide that we would like to “hang out” again (whatever that means) so I guess that’s a step in the right direction. I’m laying off the smoking thing for the moment. I mean, it’s really unfair to say to someone you’ve barely been on a date with “hey… it’d be great if you could quit your addictive behavior. I’m sure it’ll be a piece of cake” I think a little bit of time is in order. We shall see what happens.

Well, the O’s beat the Blue Jays 8-4 and believe it or not, Cabrera pitched. Markakis went 2-4 with a home run and Tejada contributed a solo shot as well. I will get down on my hands and knees and (get your minds out of the gutter) beg and plead to keep Tejada in Baltimore, along with Roberts, Mora and Markakis. I’m pretty sure if Tejada goes, Roberts won’t be far behind him and I’m so not having that. Baltimore needs a (kinda) hometown hero and I want it to be B-Rob. Who’s with me?

Franco’s new girlfriend has a retarded brother on Rescue Me. One of the guys asks if he’s “rain man retarded or Paris Hilton retarded.” How can you not love these writers? I believe the answer was Paris Hilton retarded only because the brother can function and pee on his own. And I don’t want Probie to go. His douchebag buddy outed him at the firehouse last week and now he’s getting ragged on for being gay. I mean, he experimented (as a blow job receiver, not giver) and decided he likes girls. Now he’s getting harassed at work and wants to transfer, which honestly, I can’t blame him. But I don’t like it one bit and he can’t go. Maybe by the time the episode is over things will change, but I doubt I’ll be awake long enough to find out.

Time to pack up my shoes and go to bed. I may be MIA for a few days until I can get my computer up and running at home. If so, I’ll be SURE to post my Project Runway thoughts from work on Thursday, as long as you promise not to tell that I’m using work time for my (and your) entertainment.

Why does that dress look familiar?

Yes, you've seen that dress before. It's the bridesmaid dress from the wedding I was in back in July. Hey, if you pay $225 for a dress, you have every right to wear it as often as you can! I never imagined that someone from the last wedding would be at this wedding but as luck would have it, the best man from the last one was also at this one. So, he cracked on me the whole time about the dress but that's ok. It fit and was a nice change from the sea of black dresses that usually populate a wedding reception.

The wedding was such a great time. Shannon was the most beautiful bride and I think everyone had a great time! I danced a lot, drank some more and as always, made friends with the bartenders! They are good people to know because I was never without a drink and most of the time, I had two. I was back at Chez Kenny around 11:30, ate pizza and little smokes, watched some of Pulp Fiction and was asleep by midnight. I could have stayed longer, but it’s probably a good thing I didn’t. This morning was a little hairy, but Dad made breakfast (what should be the last) and that always helps!

I have yet to take a nap so forgive me if my stream of consciousness is a little sketchy! I ordered my curtains online, changed my address and then it was time to go pick up the futon I had bought. My sister’s co-worker sold it to me for $50 and it’s in great condition so it was one hell of a deal. It looks great in the spare room and it’s relatively comfortable to sit on. I don’t know about sleeping on it, but I’m sure someone will use it next weekend so we’ll find out! I brought some stuff over to the house but god sidetracked when a few friends showed up to see the house. I SHOULD have gone back to the house tonight but instead I got some stuff out of the attic and got it ready to go to the house tomorrow. I wanted to go to Counting Crows/Goo Goo Dolls but Sarah has a ball game so she had to bail on me. It’s probably for the best because I really do need to do some things at the house the next two nights so Wednesday can be our first night in the new place. I’m so damn anxious. Once I was walking around today and saw how well “the lamp” looked, I was so motivated to move everything in!! I admit, I lost that drive but I still can’t wait to get in there. Just a few days! Shit… then what am I going to talk about?!

Here’s what you’ve all been waiting for: Details on the pseudo blind date. I met up with Lacey and her friend Mike around 7:30 on Friday. Mike’s family owns a farm in Schodack and they have llamas, which sometimes you can see from I-90. So, Mike knew I was a fan and bought me over to see them. It gave me weird Catskill Game Farm flashbacks, but in a good way. I was so excited!! After that, we continued to J’s house where we finally got to meet. He’s a nice guy and pretty easy on the eyes, which is never a bad thing! Lol.. So, J’s roomie has this dog who let out what I can only describe as a fart reminiscent of an A-Bomb. This thing cleared the room in 2.5 seconds. So, we’re all outside and pretty much everyone but me pulls out cigarettes. For those of you who don’t know me very well, a guy that smokes is pretty much a deal breaker for me. I just don’t find it attractive to kiss someone whose mouth tastes like an ashtray!! I don’t lecture those who do it, but it doesn’t mean I need to completely tolerate it either. Plus, both my maternal grandparents died of lung cancer so I hold a bit of a bias. Anyway, so that turned me off which sucked cause we were getting along pretty well I think. Then again, what the hell do I know!? So, we decide to go see Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby, which had its funny moments, but it’s no Anchorman. Then again, I hated Anchorman the first time I saw it so that might not really be a good way to describe the movie! Anyway, after the movie we headed back to Mike’s house (where my car was parked) and we all hung out for a little while longer. Two other guys showed up and since it was getting late, I decided to leave. Leaving was so insanely awkward cause it was all these people I didn’t know and what was I supposed to do? I think I might have slapped him goodbye or something! Lol.. I should know what to do by now, but I really didn’t. So, I have no idea what this kid thought of me and God know what he thinks I thought of him since I basically left and that was it! Lol.. Oh well, I guess that’s what dating is all about. So, in a nutshell; he’s a nice, cute guy and we just basically gave each other shit the entire night which I think was better than things being awkward cause it really wasn’t at all until the end! I’ll keep you posted if there’s anything to keep you posted on!

So, that was my weekend. Never long enough but that’s the story of my life! I hope everyone had a great weekend and try hard to make it through your Monday!!

Where do I begin?

I turn 30 in exactly 12 days (depending on when you read this) and since I got my sister what can only be described as the most kick-ass 30th birthday present (which I can’t tell you about on the off chance she’ll read this blog – the VERY off chance), I think it’s only fair of me to put my own birthday wish list together.

Tickets to a Broadway show (preferably the revival of A Chorus Line)
Window mount for my XM radio
Movie tickets (I like going to the movies)
Gift cards to Pier One or other such stores
Plane tickets (to anywhere –I’m not picky)
Jewelry – chicks dig jewels. I’ve had one guy give me jewelry and it was a watch. I’m not really sure what that means.

Ok… I’m kidding just a little bit but hell, you only turn 30 once so I might as well try to milk it for all it’s worth, am I right?

Last night I auditioned to dance in a local production of the Will Rogers Follies. I say I auditioned, but really I showed up and that seemed to be enough. It was me and three other girls that I used to dance with so I’m pretty sure I’m gonna make it. However, I’m not gonna lie. I’m rusty! I really didn’t think I was, but I realized that I am. I mean, when I was dancing on a regular basis I could pick things up like it was nobody’s business. I really had trouble last night. Not necessarily picking things up, but keeping it in my head. I guess I should give myself a break considering I haven’t put a pair of tap shoes on in two years, but it’s not my style and I expect more. I guess it’ll just be getting back into the swing of things. That and finding my own tap shoes that are somewhere in storage. I had to borrow my cousin Lindsey’s! Anyway, I’ll keep you updated on the show. They don’t have a leading man as of yet so I’m not 100% sure it’s going to even get off the ground!

So, I couldn’t post last night because I was kinda busy. Near the end of So You Think You Can Dance (more on that later) I got a phone call… from a boy. I’m not gonna lie – I considered not answering the phone because Project Runway was coming up, but I answered it anyway. Anyway, the story is this: My friend from work has decided she wants to hook me up, which is not a terrible thing. She’s been trying to do this for about two weeks and it just hasn’t happened so this week she decided she would make it happen. I didn’t really want to do a blind date thing (which really isn’t fair cause I’ve seen pics of him, but he not of me – hi awkward) so she decided we were going to get a group together and do something. So, as of tomorrow night, we’re going mini golfing and to a movie. I met Lacey’s man today (he’s adorable) so at least I’ll know someone but her, which is a plus. I’ve also emailed with this guy (we’ll call him J.) and we had a pretty decent conversation last night. He’s younger than me (and honestly, that’s usually not my thing) but I’m not getting any younger so why not give it a shot! Lol.. So, basically what I’m trying to say is that I’ve got a pseudo blind date tomorrow night and we’ll see how it goes.

Ok.. back to business. PROJECT RUNWAY! I admit, I was on the phone for most of it, but I got the gist. Keith did get booted, but not for the reason they made it out to be. I had heard tons of rumors that he stole his designs from another designer but it seems he got booted for having how-to books under his bed. How were the producers alerted to this? Kayne, the pageant queen. God, that should make for one hell of a reunion special, don’t you agree?! I can’t wait!!! Anyway, apparently he also left the production for a few hours and used the internet, two things that aren’t allowed. So basically, he made his bed and needs to lie in it; just no longer at the Atlas Hotel. No one really seemed sorry to see him go (at least not from what I saw – he WAS a bit of a diva) but the show must go on! On the runway the two teams with the highest votes were (can you believe it?) Angela’s (who somehow got to be the team leader even with her lame ass sketch that is now being sold on a t-shirt at Macy’s – it is NOT on my birthday list) and what used to be Keith’s group, which includes Allison and Jeffrey. Honestly, I liked Angela’s outfit and it really kills me to say that. I don’t know, she just rubs me the wrong way and as much as I didn’t like the people she conflicted with, I didn’t like her either! Well, the two top teams were told they would have to go to Macy’s the next day to see who won the challenge (ooh, the anticipation) and were dismissed. The bottom two teams, led by Robert (Barbie) and Bonnie (Nike) had to explain themselves. I was just saying last week that I liked Bonnie and thought she was doing a really good job of flying under the radar, but she killed it this week (and not in the good way) with the most heinous, ill-fitting pants I’ve ever seen. Needless to say, Bonnie bit the big one and had to go home. Next week it looks like Jeffrey’s going to take on the bitchy diva role and allow Angela to become someone’s prey. Do we see a trend? I can’t wait!

All I can say about So You Think You Can Dance is that my ideal final four are Natalie, Heidi (again, hurts me to write it), Benji and Travis. I would like Natalie and Travis to win. Oh wait.. does only one of them win? I don’t remember. Anyway, it’s way past time for Donyelle to go home and Ivan just isn’t as charismatic or as trained as the other two, in my opinion. Then again, I just told you how rusty I am so do you really trust my dancing judgment? I want to smack Mary Murphy almost as much as I want to give Paula Abdul a muscle relaxer during the AI judging. Anyway, I’m actually watching the results show as we speak but I’m watching Omarion perform and god knows if I’ll still be writing in 15-20 minutes when they announce who’s going home. If I am, I’ll make an update, I promise!

I went to see the movie John Tucker Must Die tonight. It was pretty entertaining. I liked Brittany Snow from when she was on American Dreams and the abs on that girl are insane! You would never know they were underneath her clothes unless that was a really good makeup job. But anyway, the movie was pretty funny and I’m happy to say we weren’t the oldest people in the studio. Plus, I got popcorn for dinner and I never complain about that.

I came across something wonderful yesterday: Peanut Butter M&M’s. Oh my god, they’re like eating a piece of heaven. I think I’m addicted to them and if you like peanut butter, you will be too! Granted, they’re basically Reese’s Pieces, but they’re chewier. Try them my blogging minions, try them!!

Hmm.. what else? Today I was listening to my Ipod at work and was perturbed because I could see it was playing, but I couldn’t hear anything. I checked the settings and I even checked to make sure my headphones were plugged in all the way (they were). I probably should have checked to see if the headphones were in my ear because they weren’t. Note to self: if the headphones are not in your ear, it’s more than likely you won’t be able to hear the music. It’s been a long week.

O’s lost a heartbreaker last night, 2-1 to the Mariners and Brian Roberts got ejected from the game for the first time in his career, apparently for arguing balls and strikes. I’m sorry, but it had to be pretty bad for him to say something cause from what I’ve seen, he’s not the most vocal guy. Javy Lopez was put on waivers, not that it really means anything but hey, we’ll see what happens. I can’t seem to find any scores for tonight, and in all honesty, I’m not sure the O’s are playing tonight which could make it difficult! What can I say? I can’t be the only one who’s getting a little bored with the season considering we’re out of it! I’m not afraid to admit it.

Ok – it’s results time: Natalie’s going home which is complete bullshit and America basically gave the competition to Heidi cause there is no way Donyelle compares to her. I can’t bitch because I meant to vote but didn’t (I did the same thing to Chris Daughtry so I’m an equal opportunity non-voter). It’s probably best for Natalie cause the winner gets to dance in Celine Dion’s Vegas show and I’m not sure if that’s a punishment or prize for her. She can do so much more and I certainly hope she does! As for the boy’s Travis is safe (YAY) so it’s just a matter of minutes before I find out if I was half right tonight (after the break of course).

Barry Bonds 715th home run ball sold for $220,100 on Ebay. I hope most of that money goes to a good cause, like the insurmountable legal fees he’s caused for all those involved in his run for this record. Just my opinion.

I was right! Ivan is going home, as well he should. So, I really don’t know who to predict as winners because Benji really is talented, even though I like Travis more. I can’t pick one person to win (nor do I know if I have to) so I guess we have to just wait and see what happens next week. Stop crying Travis!!!!

Ok, time for the finals of the World Series of Pop Culture (priorities). Night all!

Happy Birthday MTV!

I was only (almost) 5 years old when MTV debuted, but I actually remember when they played videos. Anyone else? For those of you who know me, you know I’m addicted to most MTV reality shows, but I still wish they played a video anytime other than TRL. Regardless, Happy 25th Birthday to MTV and all that goes along with it.

The O’s suffered a 10-5 loss last night but my two favorite boys contributed home runs, B-Rob’s all the way to Eutaw Street. And oh yeah, we all know I love me some Javy (ok… I love me some Javy ass) but I really wish he’d show more of that and shut the fuck up. You couldn’t handle first base and you’re not that great a catcher anymore so no, you’re not playing on a regular basis. VERY observant. Regardless of that fact, it’s not something you need to broadcast to the world. Do the Orioles even have a public relations department because it sure seems like anyone on the team that speaks to the press sounds like an absolute moron or fucks themselves. Speaking of Lopez(es), Rodrigo pitched 7.2 innings and got the win in a 2-0 defeat of the Seattle Mariners. Markakis and Mora contributed the two necessary RBI’s and again, take that Markakis naysayers.

I made a wonderful discovery today and that was the Real World/Road Rules blog. I can’t believe it took me so long to figure this out, especially considering it’s on blogspot. I actually spent the last half hour of work today (don’t tell) perusing web sites of former Real Worlders. I got bored with it pretty quickly, but considering I don’t have the time to commit (or energy to care) about what’s going on with every single alumni of the two shows, it’s pretty nice to have one place to go to get all my news. I’m still a little stunned by all the incestuous relationships between these people (and how they score with models considering they have no real jobs) but hey… take the opportunities you can get, I guess. So, as appalled as I am at myself, I am still quite happy with my find. Deal with it.

However, I made a much more interesting find on the internet today. Not only is there a Dwight Schrute bobblehead (which will look adorable on my desk next to my Brian Roberts celebration bobblehead – ya know, once they fix that coloring issue) but the next best thing has come: A Tim Gunn bobblehead doll. It actually looks like him and the stand it’s on says “Make it Work.” I must have one.

I really love Rescue Me. I haven’t been around to watch it the last few weeks, but the first few minutes of tonight’s show was absolutely priceless and reminded me why it’s one of the funniest and entertaining shows on television.

House update: My rug is on backorder, the sink won’t work and my shelves don’t fit. But I did buy new sheets today because you can’t go into a new house with old sheets. It’s just not right. My sister has finally resigned herself to the fact that we won’t be in the house this weekend like we’d hoped, but I believe all the stuff will be out of storage this weekend, which is a step in the right direction. Now all we’ll have to do is take our bedroom stuff over to the house during the week next week. We will BARELY be in before Nytropalooza but I guess barely is better than not at all, am I right?

Time for bed

The weekend is never long enough

Where do I begin? No ball games, so instead Friday night was a bit of a drunken blur which is funny because I literally had no intention of even being out. I think I may have had a fever. However, some friends of ours came down to go out so I figured I’d better make an appearance. 14 beers, three shots and some red wine on my sister’s white pants later, we figured it was time to go home! I went straight to bed (as I have a tendency to do) and was rudely woken up at 8:30 by my sister, who told me that not only did the red wine come out of her pants, but she also left her cell phone in her pocket, making it the cleanest (yet non-working) cell phone on the planet. Believe it or not, it’s starting to work but the ringer sounds like… well… it defies description. Anyway, I finally rolled out of bed around 11:30 and was quickly distracted by the movie “Hackers” with Angelina Jolie and Jonny Lee Miller. I LOVE that movie and for some reason don’t own it, therefore I felt it only right to take the opportunity to watch it on TV. My mother felt differently (have I mentioned that our move in date can’t come quick enough?) so after a healthy round of grease, I showered and the shopping began. I was able to get everything I needed for the bathroom, not to mention my bedside table so things are moving along. Slowly but surely.

Saturday night I went to see The Lipstick Lovelies, a burlesque show that some of the girls I used to dance with perform in. It was interesting. I’ll be honest. I wasn’t quite sure what burlesque entailed and it was raunchier than I expected but I had a great time. It was really funny and entertaining, that’s for sure. It was nice to see a few bigger girls in the show that were still funny and sexy. However, if I ever performed in the show I really don’t think I would urge my parents to go. There are just some things you don’t want to hear coming from your daughter’s mouth, whether it’s true or not! Sunday was Track Day! We had an awesome time (see picture). I actually won the first race and was up $30 most of the day, but as time wore on we started making some random bets that didn’t really pan out. In all honesty, I pick the horses that have the prettiest names so it’s all a game of chance to me. I ended up being the driver and (take this advice) I highly recommend you don’t take three drunk people to Applebee’s. It’s just not a fun situation to be in. Funny? Yes. Fun for the sober person? Not so much. Regardless, we had a really great time and I think that even after dinner, I ended up being down only $4.00. What can I say? The colors and jockey names treated me well.

The O’s are losing 9-4 but we still have Miggy! Thank god for small favors. Ok, that’s probably a big favor cause I was pretty sure something was gonna happen before the trade deadline. Luckily, it was just talk. It sounds like Tejada really does want to stay in Baltimore and maybe his notoriety can be used to bring some pure talent in next year. I guess we’ll have to wait and see what happens. Regardless, it’s going to be a very long (and hopefully eventful) offseason!

I wasn’t really around all weekend so I don’t have any television news. I’m watching Fresh Meat now, but it’s only just begun so I’m afraid I can’t rant about my hatred of Wes and other such entertaining tidbits. Unfortunately, not much else has gone on as of late. No real good entertainment news (which is what I live for) and I haven’t even gone to the movies in a week. I’m slacking, I know. I was watching The 40 Year Old Virgin on HBO earlier tonight. I don’t know. Everyone raves about the movie and I’m wondering if it’s similar to Anchorman in that I need to see it 3 or 4 times before I really think it’s as funny as everyone else. The first time I saw Anchorman (and Napoleon Dynamite for that matter) I couldn’t believe how ridiculously stupid it was. Now I don’t think I go a day without quoting it. Guess we’ll have to wait for multiple HBO viewings before I make a decision on it. Hope everyone had a great weekend and be glad Monday’s over!!

PS – Holy Shit! Coral and Evan just got booted from the Challenge for being too injured to continue. That’s my girl! Plus, they were front runners so you know everyone was happy to see them go. Not to mention, Evan was talking about his hernia possibly strangling his intestine and he mispronounced intestine. Too frigging funny. I can go to bed happy.

The Plight of Music in my Car

As I was driving to work today, I was lamenting that my XM radio was not yet hooked up (which is my own fault because I’ve been too lazy to buy the new hookup I need) and went through the CD’s I have in my six CD changer in my car. They are as follows:

1) Chicago’s Greatest Hits 1982-1989
2) Mix CD I made - highlights include Crazy Bitch by Buckcherry, Promiscuous by Nelly Furtado, Leave the Pieces by the Wreckers, I Love You by Cheri Dennis, Conceited by Remy Martin and other such songs (if that makes sense)
3) Mix CD - highlights include Teenage Dirtbag by Wheatus, I Walk Alone by Oleander and other such alternative songs I can’t think of right now
4) Counting Crows - Live from the New Amsterdam
5) Soundtrack to the Broadway Musical “Avenue Q”
6) George Michael’s Greatest Hits - the fast songs

Sometimes I’m pretty sure there’s a gay man trapped in my body, which explains my love of men (preferably bald) and the Bravo network, but makes no sense of my baseball fascination. Anyway, I really do not have terrible taste in music. Honest, I don’t. I just caught myself at a bad time. Then again, I really don’t feel the need to explain myself because if you have never seen Avenue Q (Rob - you know who you are) then you can’t fully appreciate songs such as “The Internet is for Porn” and “Everyone’s a Little Bit Racist.” The pure wrongness of these songs just makes your day brighter, I promise. Counting Crows is a staple no matter what, and I had to get my mid-80’s Chicago fix. Other than that, I think it’s a nice eclectic mix. Sometimes I like really hard guitars with girl hating rock, and other times, sentimental country. I’m equal opportunity when it comes to my music. That’s all I’m trying to say.

Two more dancers were kicked off So You Think You Can Dance last night; Alison and Ryan. Ryan was deserved. I thought he should have gotten kicked off weeks ago, but Alison is a really phenomenal dancer. Then again, they all are at this point although I think Donyelle was the weak link and I would have kicked her and Ryan to the curb. My boy Travis is most certainly playing for the other team after watching his reactions to everyone getting kicked off and to him being the bottom 2. He did have a rough week and everyone else had great weeks (except for Ryan) so it made sense. I’m not knocking it. However, I did find out that Heidi and Benji are cousins which explained the toothy smiles, but made it insanely creepy for me to watch them dance ballroom together. I don’t know. To me, ballroom dancing is (and should be) like watching two people have sex. It should be sensual and make you wonder if they’re getting it on when they’re not dancing. They’re both incredible dancers, but I really wish they wouldn’t dance together ever again. I think it’s going to get really hard from this point on. Honestly, I think even this decision was really hard. I mean, they’re all great and apparently are going on tour. I have to say I would probably go see that. I find myself sometimes watching the backup dancers at certain concerts more than the performers and I’m curious to see how they would pull it off. It’s basically going to be an American Idol format where the top 10 perform and they’ll do some of their more popular dances from the show. Could be interesting.

World Series of Pop Culture put one team into the finals and they are The Boeghy Bunch, all decked out in blue polos and khakis. I like them cause they beat the team I hated most, the Velvet Rope Revolution. This one guy on the team was so cocky and it was great when he was booted cause he didn’t know all the stars from Dancing with the Stars in the tiebreak. However, that game lasted longer than normal so we still don’t know who the other team is going to be. Now I have to tune in for that and the Finals next week. The one team in contention (who I hope wins) is Almost Perfect Strangers, people who qualified at VHI.com with a pop culture quiz and just met each other the night before the show taped. I think it would be so cool if they won! I mean, to not know your teammates strengths and weaknesses and still be able to bring the pain is amazing to me! I have to laugh because I did go online this past week and take their pop culture quiz and sucked but I’ve kicked some major ass on the TV questions. Maybe next year I’ll be blogging from there! lol.. A girl can dream, can’t she?

Anyway, I’ll get into a little O’s chat. O’s won 6-4 last night and won the Series which is great. Rodrigo Lopez put in a performance. Not stellar, but hey… we got a win, am I right? And may I ask, what the hell is up with Fernando Tatis? He was on the ESPN ticker the other night and I think I looked at my Dad and said “who the fuck is that guy?” Apparently he got his first major league hit the same day that Roger Clemens broke a few records (like we care) and subsequently “fell off the face of the earth” in the words of Kevin Millar. I guess he’s back and since we’re giving our bench guys time to play (why the fuck not?) he’s doing his best to woo the organization. Way to go Fernando. I’ll take any port in a storm at this point. The majority of our remaining games are against teams in contention for the playoffs so let’s fuck with their heads a little bit and play some good baseball!

Anyway, if the rain holds off I’ve got a ball game tonight (our ONLY Friday night game) and a room reserved at Chez Kenny (my cousin’s boyfriend’s house). Tomorrow should consist of a day perusing Home Depot, Target and other such stores to get the house situated because we should be able to start bringing stuff over this week. Dad has polyurethaned most of the floors and it really looks like a place you can live in. Now if we can get the bats out of the chimney and the lone woodchuck out from under the garage I MIGHT not be afraid to stay there alone when Tre goes camping in the near future. Yeah, I don’t camp. I’ve gone camping twice and both times it poured and once I got all my shit stolen. I think I’m a bad camping omen so I figure it’s best for me to not do it. That’s probably when you’ll know I’m in love cause I don’t go camping for any reason. I’m really not sure if even true love can do it. Well, unless it’s Brian Roberts. I’d camp for him.

THIS IS FOR THE LADIES: Ever since my mom “retired” she’s been a bit of an online shopper. I’ve gotten some really cute skirts and cheap moisturizer out of the deal, so I don’t complain. However, she might have hit the jackpot this time. I know all of you have seen the infomercials for makeup made of minerals, of which there seem to be two brands: Bare Escentuals and the other one that’s endorsed by Leeza Gibbons and Melissa Gilbert. Well, my mom decided to buy Bare Escentuals and I would get to try it too. It came yesterday and we watched the instructional video (which was a waste and a little irritating) but figured we’d wait until today to try it. I tend to be red in the face (damn sensitive skin) so I was curious and pretty sure it wasn’t going to work. Well, I did it this morning and I admit that I was pleasantly surprised with the results. I don’t look like I’m wearing a mask, yet I feel like I’m covered. It’s not cheap, but then again, neither is the department store stuff when you really think about it, Plus, you don’t look like a drag queen when you wear it, which is something (straight) men seem to like! Anyway, I’ll keep you posted as to progress on the house (and my face) and I hope everyone has a very happy weekend!!!

Bad start to the day

I forgot my Ipod. Do you have any idea how quiet it is in this office? I am not the type of girl who can go without music and I forgot my freakin’ Ipod. I overslept (more on that later) and walked right out of the house without it. I mean, at least I know it’ll be charged when I go to use it tomorrow, but that’s not really helping me today. I’m gonna see if I can find an online radio station or something although if I have to download something to my computer I’m screwed. They don’t allow us to download ANYTHING, not even a cutesy screen saver, to our computers. Might crash the whole system or something to that effect. I did go on Yahoo!, remembering they have Launchcast stations so right now I’m listening to their Adult Alternative station, which doesn’t seem to be so bad, but I know I have to deal with commercials. I guess that’s my penance for forgetting my Ipod. I will pay the price.

Let’s get down to business: Harold Reynolds of ESPN has apparently been fired for sexual harassment. He says it was a hug and nothing more. Not my Harold! I love him! I’m not saying he didn’t do something wrong, but we do live in a money grubbing country where people will do anything for a buck, including manipulate and backstab. Let me just say, I’m disappointed. That’s all. I hope it all turns out for the best because I will miss him at ESPN. I still miss Keith Olbermann so I may never get over this.

I went to my sister’s ball game last night so I did not see ANY of So You Think You Can Dance. Hopefully I’ll be able to get some updates online today and I’ll do my best to watch the results show tonight. If not, well I’ll just hope that the people I don’t like get booted. Such is life. I did, however, manage to catch Project Runway. Ok, I saw the end before the beginning, but thanks to Bravo’s sly programming I was able to see what I missed directly after the show ended (Thank you Bravo!) So, where do I begin? Does Laura own an outfit that doesn’t show her ridiculously overexposed breastbones? For a mother of three, I really wish she’d cover up that pit of nothingness. One more thing on Laura: I like her. I think she’s really talented and her clothes seem really wearable. But just because she THINKS they’re going to be working with horses doesn’t mean she needs to wear an equestrian costume to the park. I mean, she was seriously done up in the pants, tall boots, the whole shebang. I expected her to be wearing that cute little jockey hat, regardless of the fact that she is WAY too tall to be one. Keith is a crazy bitch (and I dig that), and I really wish I hadn’t read all the spoilers cause I know it’s him going home next week. I wonder if they’ll kick anyone else off or just leave that as a “bye” week? I can’t wait to find out. And oh my god - as I was reading the credits last night I realized that Tim Gunn’s wardrobe is from Macy’s. Ok, the man works for Parsons School of Design and his suits are from Macy’s? I have nothing against Macy’s, but I’m also not pretending to be in the fashion world. I’m sure he gets them for free but you know Tim has some fierce Prada suits in his closet. Way to take one for the team Tim Gunn. It was Katherine’s turn to go although I am really ready to throw in Angela’s towel. Something about her smirky superiority irks me. I don’t know what it could be. As for Bradley - lucky break, my friend. It really would have sucked to get booted on your birthday! I’m a big fan of Uli, and I really like Bonnie too. She’s flown under the radar so much that I had to rewatch the show to even see her once. I’m not sure if that’s good or bad for her. Finally, the big deal this year was that there were (supposedly) lots of straight men. Um… where? Ok, Jeffrey and Michael are my guesses. Keith is questionable and since Malan was a vampire I really don’t think that counts. Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?

Bad news on this Thursday: Prince’s wife has filed for divorce. Guess he’s been a bit too busy promoting himself to be a good husband. Shame on you, Prince. (Prince Robert Nelson to his homies). Seriously, how do you have a last name like Nelson and name your kid Prince? Ok, granted, Ricky Nelson named his kid Gunnar which must have really sucked considering his brother’s name was something as trivial as Matthew. Don’t get me wrong, I laminated the Nelsons onto my trapper keeper in high school just like any other girl, but can you imagine the ridicule he got? No wonder he felt the need to redeem himself on Celebrity Fit Club! I mean, I’m not into really conventional names. If (god forbid) I spawn a boy, I plan to name him Ripken, even if I have to bribe his father to let me do so, but celebrities are really going over the edge with children’s names. I understand the whole individuality angle but public and private schools are a hotbed of ridicule. Way to scar your kid for life, even more than you already have.

Time to listen to some new music. Ever since I got my new car I haven’t listened to the radio because I haven’t been able to hook up my XM. Really, I’m just lazy and haven’t bought a new mount for it. I have the link, I just haven’t done it. It’s all my fault. Anyway, I’m usually pretty up on my music but I’ve been a bit of a slacker lately so hopefully I’ll be able to hear some new jams while I’m listening to Yahoo. I already heard Crazy by Gnarls Barkley for the first time and I enjoyed it. I hope I’m not subjected to that Paris Hilton single because I’m afraid my ears will start to bleed. My sister gave Justin Timberlake’s new single a bad review so now I’m curious. I’ll keep you posted. Happy almost Friday!

More reasons to watch TV

I never got into the show Lost, mainly because I wasn’t home enough to watch it on a constant basis. By the time I got my Tivo, I had already missed the majority of the show and felt I couldn’t commit to it. However, the addition of Rodrigo Santoro could change my mind. For those of you who don’t know who this handsome Brazilian is:

1) See picture at left

2) He romanced Laura Linney in Love Actually and tried to kill people in Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle

3) Have you looked at the picture?

Anyway, he’s a beautiful hunk of man (with an accent to boot) and if he’s gonna be on the Lost island, I want to be there too. If there is a God, he will be shirtless. I mean, they’re on a desert island. It’s GOT to be hot!

So, Lance Bass is gay. Is anyone shocked? There have been countless pictures of him with Reichen from the Amazing Race (Reichen - you can do better) and he hangs out at Kathy Griffin’s house. I mean, if you’re a guy hanging out at Kathy’s you might as well wrap yourself up in a rainbow flag and parade down the streets of P-Town. But hey, best of luck to you Lance, and congratulations for finally realizing that coming out isn’t going to ruin the careers of youself and any of the N’Sync boys. Most of them have done a good job of it themselves (What was the name of Chris Kirkpatrick’s clothing line? Fu Manchu or something?)You’ll have a show on Bravo before you know it and I’ll probably watch it! I can feel the glares and I’m ashamed already.

Remember my Work Out rant from yesterday? I still hate Brian. I caught a little bit of the episode when I got back from the movies last night and he’s just this petty little child! Apparently he told Rebecca (Amazing Race girl) that Jesse (new gay trainer) called her a slut (which she probably is) and then HE confronted him about it because he said he would "take care of it." So why tell her in the first place? DRAMA... After Jesse and Rebecca had settled things, he still couldn’t help but be a douchebag. He doesn’t need a southern accent to sound stupid, he’s doing it all on his own. I can’t wait till he gets fired cause I’ll be shocked if it doesn’t happen. I’m not talking gay Lance Bass shocked, more like ousting of Chris Daughtry shocked.

I went to see You, Me and Dupree last night. Eh… it was ok. I really like Kate Hudson and she was pretty good in it, but I’m just not a huge Owen Wilson fan. However, as much as he played a complete fuck-up, I really started to feel for him near the end of the movie, so I guess he’s good at what he does. I think Matt Dillon looks better now than he did in the 80’s and 90’s and Michael Douglas is just… well… old! I never thought I’d say that. It’s like he all of a sudden turned 80. Him and Tom Skerrit. They were like, my hot old men and now they just look rugged, but not in the good way. They kind of look like they got rode hard and put away wet.

Ok, my last rant of the morning. Do you ever feel like a lazy son of a bitch for taking the elevator? Not so much at work, but in the parking garage. I always park on the 4th floor because it’s easy to find a space and I always take the elevator cause I wear cute shoes that aren’t very comfortable. So, people walk by me to the stairs as I’m waiting, and I can feel them looking at me and I feel like they’re thinking “she could stand to take the stairs” or something else disparaging because I’ve done the same thing (which is wrong and I understand that). What I really want to do is say to them (the men especially) is “walk a day in my shoes and see if you want to take the stairs!” If I’m wearing comfortable shoes, I will attempt the stairs. However, since I haven’t been to the gym in three months the stairs are not my friend so I’m taking the easy way out. Isn’t that what America is all about!?

There may be more later. After all, tonight is Project Runway AND So You Think You Can Dance! And to think, I actually considered leaving the house tonight. What the hell was I thinking? Happy Birthday Cousin!!!

Tuesday is Reality TV Day

I couldn’t help but post this link that my friend (and ex-babysitter) Shell sent to me today. Now, we all know I am not a fan of celebrity babies (even though their pampered lives aren’t really their fault) but if they had any brains at all, this is probably exactly what they would say (ya know, if they could talk).

So, Richard Hatch is going to jail and appearing nude in an indie film. Explain to me why that is necessary (the nudity thing, not jail). I guess he’s the poster child for all money winners around the world. Pay your god damn taxes! I mean, it’s not like he didn’t make quite a bit of dough after winning Survivor on promotional appearances alone. He probably made the tax money within a couple of months! You’re an idiot, Richard. I believe he’s already shot his nude role which is too bad because prison would probably get him down to fighting weight. Then again, it’s not like he’s gonna try to fight off would-be anal sex predators (with anything more than a girly slap) so maybe it’s all for the best. Don’t look at me like that. He’s gay and more than likely enjoys anal sex. I’ve seen Oz and apparently most prisoners like anal sex too. I’m just spouting nonsense that I’ve learned from cable television. Give me a break!

Today is C. Thomas Howell’s wedding anniversary. 14 years, I believe. Anyway, that’s not the great part. What I enjoyed the most is what when I looked up his profile on www.imdb.com, he was listed as “child rodeo star.” Now, I don’t frequent the rodeo circuit unless you count the mechanical bull at the Columbia County Fair (which has been sorely missed, might I add) but I would love to know how good old C. Thomas parlayed that into a career playing Ponyboy Curtis. Regardless, congratulations to him for a marriage in Hollywood (kind of) that’s lasted more than it’s obligatory 15 minutes. Then again, I think he married a regular gal. That always helps.

I caught the majority of Bravo’s new show Work Out, which starts at its regular time tonight at 9. I’m not sure what to think of it yet. I would kill for any of the bodies on these trainers (one of whom has already outlasted her 15 minutes as a contestant on The Amazing Race), that’s for damn sure. The owner of the gym, Jackie, is an uberbitch but we all know I like that and it’s good television! She doesn’t have much of a personality but a girlfriend with a fiery temper. She’s also a biter…. OUT of the bedroom. That’s a little creepy but hey, everyone loves a bit of drama. I’ve never seen a woman pull off a Mohawk like Jackie does so I’m gonna give her a shot and see if she makes any of her trainers throw up on this week’s installment. There’s this one trainer, Brian who actually says “these are the hands of Michelangelo” referring to himself. Um, last I checked you weren’t really using your hands for anything but to feel up the slutty Amazing Race girl who has a boyfriend, but sits on Brian’s face at a moment’s notice while there are clients in the gym. But hey, who am I to judge other people’s relationships!? What I’m trying to say is that I hope Brian gets fired and that the cute, new gay trainer kicks his overly masculine ass. Then screws him in it. OH shoot.. that was mean and I apologize. What is up with me and the ass references today?

Speaking of asses, I caught the Real Word/Road Rules Challenge: Fresh Meat last night. While my favorite retard Wes didn’t get in the Exile, he did try to help Eric and Katie win by giving them some insider insight, which blew up in his face. Katie can’t walk two feet without hacking up a lung from the cigarettes perpetually attached to her face and Eric is… well… he’s a big boy. Kenny is in great shape and Tina, well… if her legs moved as fast as her mouth they’d win in a landslide. But anyway, I was in and out of a Nyquil induced haze so forgive me if this synopsis isn’t complete, but both teams busted through the puzzles which allowed them to drop their bags (extremely helpful for Eric and Katie who packed about 60 or so pounds more than Tina and Kenny) and even though they forgot the flag, Tina and Kenny were able to pull it out by a considerable margin. The look on Wes’s face when they showed up at the door instead of his beloved Katie and Eric (who he would have backstabbed if they had made it back) was priceless. I think his little Mohawk fell just a tad that day…. or maybe that was the Australian humidity. Who knows?

I have every intention of going to the movies tonight, but my one friend wants to go to the late show. I know it’s pathetic, but I really like going to bed whenever I fall asleep (usually shortly after 10) instead of forcing myself to stay awake. I mean, I guess if the movie is good enough I shouldn’t have to force myself, but still. My throat is still killing me and nothing (but that Nyquil induced haze I mentioned earlier) is helping. I’m not sure what (if anything ) we’ll see tonight, but I narrowed it down to the following: Lady in the Water; You, Me and Dupree; My Super Ex-Girlfriend and Clerks II. If there’s anything to review, you know I’ll do it.

Oh yeah... the Orioles are attempting to play baseball tonight. It's a pretty good bet that there will be no significant trades before the deadline which means lots of fun in the offseason (we can only hope)!

Time for (yet another) cake party for an office birthday. My birthday is the next one so everyone is probably depressed cause it’ll be like… three weeks before we have cake again. We might go into withdrawal! It was carrot cake - no cake for me!!!

PS - I couldn't find a picture of my man, Alex Trebek to post but let it be known that if Ken Jennings has any more disparaging remarks to make about him, I will throw down. You do NOT accuse Alex of being a robot and bad mouth him. Without Jeopardy you'd be nobody! Ok, wait... you ARE nobody, but a nobody with a lot of money and you have my man Alex to thank for that. Don't bite the hand that feeds you Ken...

Seacrest Out

What a show!

Wow! The show last night was amazing! I didn’t get home until 12:30 (a half hour of that was just getting from SPAC to 87 but that’s to be expected) and I’m pretty tired today. Looks like it’ll be a Red Bull kind of day (Sorry Sandra)! Anyway, Huey performed first and there really was no fanfare. He just came out on stage by himself and played the harmonica for a bit before the band came out and then it was on! I knew every single song and sang along the whole time. The seats we had were really good too. They were in front of the stage in the second tier, so I had a really good view. Let me tell you something… Huey Lewis has aged really well! I mean, he looks phenomenal and sounds exactly like he did in 1984. I think it would be a great concert for anyone to go to because I’m sure you don’t realize how many of his songs you really know. The high point for me (as it always is) is the section where they sing acapella (sp.). They always sing one of my favorite songs “It’s Alright” and their voices just sound amazing together, especially with no other accompaniment. I love it! Anyway, he performed for an hour and a half and after a brief intermission, Chicago came out. They were really good but I wasn’t as excited about them as I was about Huey. I mean, I’m more of a 1982-1989 Chicago fan and they literally sang one song from that era. I don’t know if they’re attempting to forget the Peter Cetera era, but I was a little disappointed by that. However, they were really great. I love heavy horns (in my music, kids) and they certainly gave you that! As far as I know they sang all their really popular hits from the 70’s which put everyone on their feet. The great thing was that all of Huey Lewis and the News came out and they did one song together which was amazing! The trombone player for Chicago REALLY needs a stylist, but other than that I thought it was great! The lead guitarist for Chicago was an unexpected piece of eye candy, that’s for damn sure.

The house is really coming along. I finished the woodwork in the spare room yesterday but it looks like Dad will spend much of his day doing touch ups cause painting without taping is not my forte. Also, I’m having a bit of an issue. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it, but I LOVE the color of the spare room. It’s called Brick Dust from Behr and it’s this awesome shade of dusty pink. I truly adore it. So, apparently I’ve been waxing poetic about it so much that everyone is wondering why I don’t make it my bedroom instead of the other room. Many reasons for that, one of which being the lamp. I know it sounds silly, but I matched the whole other room around this ridiculously expensive lamp and I love it. However, the bedspread I got looks like it’ll match better in the other room so I’m really torn. The spare room is definitely brighter and doesn’t face the yapping dogs next door, but I think it’s slightly smaller as far as wall space. I should look and see if I have the receipt for the lamp. I can’t be upset about getting $100 back, am I right? I really need to look at both rooms and see if I can fit everything I need. But anyway, a lot got done this weekend so it looks like my dad will be able to polyurethane the floors earlier this week than we had expected. Appliances come Wednesday and after that the floors need to be put in, the front room needs to be sheetrocked and painted and the electric really needs to get done. Other than that, we’re in business.

So, for those of you that don’t know, my 30th birthday is rapidly approaching on August 15th. It’s my sister’s too, but is this blog about her? I think not. So anyway, as I was rummaging through the fridge on Thursday I realized the Orioles are playing at Yankee Stadium on my birthday. My sister is a huge Yankee fan and I (obviously) am an O’s fan. What better way to spend our birthday than watching that game!? So, when we hit up the Moosehead on Thursday night I mentioned it, and my friend Jen was a taker. I had completely forgotten about it until yesterday and she called me this morning saying that she got four bleacher seats and we are most definitely in business! I can’t wait! It’s gonna be a busy couple of weeks with the move in, Nytropalooza and this, but well worth it. Perhaps it will take the edge off turning 30! lol..

Anyway, it’s Monday and the only way I’m going to stay awake is to pretend to do some work. You all try to do the same and I’ll post more later.

What a waste of a good hair night

Here it is. Saturday night and I’m sitting in front of my computer instead of doing something fun. Granted, it’s pouring like a son of a bitch and I did have options, but my motivation for leaving the house dwindled into nothingness when I was confronted with the weather outside (it’s a tad frightful, if you must know). Therefore, I will take the time to update you on the mundane details I consider my life.

Last night I went to my sister’s ball game and then went to Andy’s after the game. Well, the members of our fall softball team were also there. These are the people that pretty much lied about me and told me that I was too slow to play ball. This, coming from a guy who had to be fast cause he couldn’t hit a ball past the infield. So, I couldn’t wait to see if he and his troll like girlfriend had the balls to talk to me. He actually did say hello and I think my exact words were “I don’t think so.” I so hate pretending I like someone when I don’t, especially when you’ve lied about and insulted me in the past. I hold grudges. BIG ones. The troll did attempt to wave to my friend Jen who pretty much cut her off at the pass. There was a lot of staring and I found it so damn entertaining. Apparently because we don’t live in Albany we’re not allowed in Albany bars so I think we blew up their spot and had a hell of a lot more fun than they did. I can’t imagine why no one said goodbye! After some jungle juice (thanks Fish) and a few beers, and a stray elbow to the lip, my sister and I ended the night with a shot of Three Wise Men. That is a mistake I will never make again and I really don’t know how I didn’t puke the minute it touched my lips. I woke up at 6:15 this morning and could still taste it. I immediately got up and brushed my teeth and tongue until there were no more remnants of alcohol-y taste on either one. As I was doing this, my friend’s dog came into the bathroom to chill out and then followed me back down the stairs to the sleeper sofa I was sharing with my sister. He sat by my side for a few minutes until he decided it would be better to hop into bed with us. Jumped right over me in between the two of us and made himself very comfortable; comfortable being his ass in my face and head on my thigh. So all in all, it was a pretty good night! I couldn’t seem to fall asleep when we got home earlier this morning, so I went to the house to try and get some more stuff done. I ended up painting the second coat in my bedroom and touching up the areas in the spare room that my Dad had caulked. After a few hours of productivity, I thought it would be ok to come home and take a nap. I was actually slightly distracted by The Witches of Eastwick on A&E (I’ve never seen it) but drowsiness won out and so began my evening of lethargy. I finally motivated myself to take a shower around 7:30 and really that was only because I was still covered in paint. I did my hair (hence the title of this post) and somewhere in between, changed out of my jeans and into my jammies and resigned myself to my bed for the rest of the night. My intentions were to watch the first Pirates of the Caribbean but I know I’m not going to stay awake long enough so I’ve shot that plan to shit too. Instead, I’m checking out the 100 Greatest Kids Stars on VH1. I actually like Tina Yothers better with her rock star makeover and Corey Haim did not age gracefully. Or else his stylist and makeup person were on vacation the day he shot his interview. You decide.

Tomorrow is Huey Lewis Day, reminiscent of either “Rex Manning Day” from Empire Records or “Nudie Magazine Day” from Billy Madison. Actually, I take that back because both those events are kinda creepy and Huey Lewis Day is anything but creepy. Speaking of Rex Manning, I was so skeeved by that role because the guy who played Rex Manning (Maxwell Caulfield) also played Michael in Grease 2 and I loved him in that movie. He had that adorable accent and good guy persona so you can imagine that I did not want him to bang Renee Zellweger in the count out room. It just seemed, well, dirty and pervlike. But anyway, back to Huey Lewis. Tomorrow night is the Huey Lewis and the News/Chicago concert and I’m going with my mother and father. Dad is actually a Huey Lewis fan too, but I’m pretty sure Mom is only going because of Chicago. Chicago was the first concert I ever saw but unfortunately, it was the first concert after the departure of Peter Cetera. Granted, the guy that replaced him sounded just like him, but it was the 80’s and it was Peter Cetera! It’ll more than likely be a very late night on Sunday night so I’ll have to post a review of sorts in the near future.

I was supposed to see Clerks II this weekend and my plan fell through. I love Kevin Smith movies (ok, I have yet to see Jersey Girl but that’s only because I feel it’s only right to watch Jersey Girl after watching Gigli, and I’m afraid that if I rent them both at the same time the video store might swallow me up or crumble to the ground) and I’m really looking forward to Clerks II. As usual, it hasn’t gotten great reviews, but I don’t think any of his movies have been anything more than cult classics. I mean, Clerks itself got it’s due thanks to word of mouth and video rentals. Still, I want to see it and when I do, I’ll let you know what I think. There are actually quite a few movies out that I would like to see, but time and money have been getting in the way. It’s amazing that for someone who loves everything about reality shows, I loathe reality.

Yet another update on the old man and the dog. I left my car in the Valatie turnaround over night and when my sister pulled in to drop me off, who do I see? You guessed it! The old man and his dog, picking up empty cans. There was an older woman sitting in a car waiting for them because it was raining out so not only does he have a dog, but it looks like he’s married. As I got in my car I looked up to make sure they weren’t in the way and he smiled at me. I thought that would not be the best time to tell him to walk his dog on the inside so I simply smiled back at him. What a way to start the morning.

After my mean post about Casey Fossum yesterday I guess it was only fair for the O’s to lose 14-7 and to have Russ Ortiz not be able to do, well, anything. He got the loss and let’s commend the front office for THAT acquisition. For the love of God, please do something in the offseason. Do whatever you can to keep Miggy, find some pitching and bring in some fresh meat. I mean, god knows we’re rebuilding but bring in people who might stick around through that time and not be in their mid-40’s. Is it just me or do we always seem to acquire the stars on their way to the middle of the downward spiral? You want examples – Sosa and Bonilla. We were supposed to get these great hitters and we got lots of money paid out on contracts that never panned out. Bring in a guy like Texeira and cut out the dead weight. Do your job. Score update – the bad end of an ass whooping. Top of 7 losing 13-3. I can say nothing more on this topic for fear I will drive to Baltimore myself to hold a sit-in at the door of Peter Angelos.

Anyway, hope everyone’s having a great weekend. Make the most of what’s left!

Finally, it's Friday!

Here’s a little eye candy for the ladies. Mr. Bobblehead himself and the future Mr. Nytransky. Then again, I guess I could change my name to his cause I’ve always been looking for a nice Smith or Jones to alleviate the torture of listening to telemarketers butcher the hell out of it. Anyway, if I had an extra $200 laying around I would be more than happy to attend Brian's Baseball Bash on Sunday August 20th (as his arm candy, of course) and meet a plethora of Orioles but alas, he hasn’t asked me. I’ll live, plus unless it rains I have a softball tournament that weekend and I can’t let my team down considering I’m good for one play every six games. I mean, those are good odds! lol.. But anyway, the O’s have Bedard starting tonight (who may be our only hope at this point) against Fossum of the Tampa Bay Devil Rays, who really should have had his head shot picture retaken cause WOW…. he looks like he just walked out of a West Virginia mine and said “I bet I can throw that ball past the mountains.” (I mean no offense to miners with that comment, as I’m sure my blog has been perpetuated by miner comments). So, let’s see if Bedard can pull out a win tonight and give me a good start to my weekend.

Anyway, let’s get to the real news: TV!!!! I did not have a chance to post my thoughts on Project Runway so here they are, better late than never. I was not a Malan fan but I’m disappointed to see him leave this early because I think he could have been a bit of a troublemaker. His pretentious accent and vampire like looks aside, I thought he had a lot of potential. If you watched the casting special you would see that he’s auditioned every year and actually made it on the show last year but turned them down. I have a feeling Tim Gunn and the others had that warm, fuzzy feeling in their stomachs when he got the boot. I mean, come on! That dress was heinous! I loathe Vincent and Angela but at least their (Ok, Vincent’s) dress was something a woman could wear and not look like a potato (minus the unflattering epaulets of course). I think it would have been pretty sad if Kayne (that’s his name, right? Who names their kid Kayne?) hadn’t won considering his extensive pageant background! I will miss Malan cause I think he might have had a bit of a Santino effect (although no one will ever imitate Tim Gunn as Santino did) and now I have to rely on Jeffrey to do so because it seems Keith (who looks to be getting a bit snarky in the next episode) is the culprit behind the whole “I have to ask you to leave” on the promo and will be departing in the near future. Apparently (innocent until proven guilty) he stole some of his designs from ones already on the runway for established designers. Guess we have to wait and see what happens but I’ll be sad to see him go too, mainly because it looks like he’s gonna get bitchy and isn’t that the fun of Project Runway in the first place?

Last night was Wing Night so I didn’t get to see the Results special of So You Think You Can Dance but I do know who got kicked off: Martha and Dmitry, he of the chest baring outfits and apparently heterosexual orientation. I’m not sure if any of the boys left are gay, straight or asexual but I still don’t think it was his time. He’s a classically trained ballroom dancer and I guess they don’t see him loosening up much and America likes their dancers “controversial.” Martha’s solo was atrocious and jerky and she really did deserve to leave because all the other girls did pretty well with their own solos. So, now we’re down to 8 and I’m curious to see who gets paired with who for next week. Contrary to my previous post, I do like watching Heidi dance so I wouldn’t mind if her and Travis got to stick together for another week, but we’ll have to wait until next week to see what happens. A TV show I did NOT miss last night was The World Series of Pop Culture, now on its regular night and time of 10:00 on Thursday. I really couldn’t believe some of the questions people were missing. I understand that being on that stage under the lights with all sorts of people watching you is a lot of pressure but the earlier questions are just so easy that I can’t see how you can go on stage at this level and not hazard a guess. I’m not gonna lie; I didn’t know what team Tony had played baseball for on Who’s the Boss (St. Louis Cardinals) or the drag names on Bosom Buddies (Buffy and Hildegarde) but other than that I pulled some stuff out of my ass and if this rolls around again, I’m recruiting Chris and Sandra as my partners. I don’t know if we could come up with as good a name as Peanut Butter and Ginelli, but I’m willing to give it a shot.

It’s Friday, thank god and I can’t wait to get out of here today. I have the Huey Lewis concert on Sunday and some painting to do in the house this weekend. There might be a painting party this weekend so bring your brushes and we’ll bring the brew! lol.. Enjoy your weekends and I’ll let you know how things go in the very near future. TGIF!

I love this kid!

This kid is Travis, from "So You Think You Can Dance." He's one of the top 5 boys and after watching the show tonight I have absolutely no clue how he can't win. Not only is he an amazing partner, but he flips through hip hop, contemporary and lyrical (which I usually hate, but was transfixed when he was on the screen) like it's nobody's business. Sure, he's a cute kid (emphasis on kid - he's 18) but blondes aren't my thing so this isn't anything close to my Chris Daughtry fascination. No boy should be able to spin the way he does and I adore him. I really wish I had watched this show from the beginning because I would like to see the other dance genres he's had to contend with. As far as this show goes, I'm surprised by a lot of what the judges have said. As I watch most of these couples they just don't look together, yet no one says anything about it. I'm far from a professional and don't pretend to be a choreographer, but I've always been taught that when you're dancing with someone (unless you're doing a completely different step) that you should be in sync. Regardless of all that, I'm addicted. I really wish someone would do a marathon of this show so I could get more involved. I mean, that's what sucked me in to both America's Next Top Model and Project Runway!

Well, movie night was a bust. We were told that there was a showing of Pirates of the Caribbean 2 at 6:20. I got a call at 5:30 telling me that the next showing was at 7:20. Apparently the movie is about 2 and a half hours long so that wouldn't get me home until about 11. I was game, but I would have preferred an earlier show. Luckily, by the time I got to the mall everyone had decided to forgo the movie in favor of dinner at Houlihan's. It was a good time but I was much happier to be home by 8:30 rather than 11! Granted, I'm a loser and my whole point was that I wanted to be home in time to catch Project Runway but I also got home in time for my new fascination. If I have to mention it again then stop reading right now cause you obviously haven't read a thing I've written.

So basically what I'm trying to say is there will be no review tonight but maybe when I get around to watching the first one, I'll tell you what I thought. Hopefully that will motivate me to want to see the second one for a good reason.

Ok, I'm back to my new favorite show and I'm not trying to be a bitch, but thank god Heidi has a body cause she looks like she fell off the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. She's a phenomenal dancer, don't get me wrong, but I can't get past her face. She's partnered with my boy this week so I'm forced to watch her. Her solo was really good but again, I get distracted. My boy is remarkable and she did quite well considering it wasn't her style of dance. I think he bought out the best in her and I think they're both safe this week. Then again, I thought Chris Daughtry was gonna win American Idol so really, who am I to judge?

Ok.. I'm obviously distracted by the TV and can concentrate on nothing but so I hope everyone had a wonderful hump day and I'll catch ya later. Time for Project Runway!!!!

Oh Happy Day!

The man and his dog are back! I saw them yesterday morning, happy as can be on their morning walk. However, they were standing in the middle of the road, waiting to cross. Now, this is probably the busiest road in Columbia County and they’re standing in the middle of it. I understand that neither of them are getting any younger and it’s probably hard enough to cross this road, as most cars are going at a good clip of 55-70 but again, the old man just continues to make me nervous. Regardless, I’d like to welcome them back to my life and reiterate how happy I am that nothing is wrong!

Ok, no post yesterday and I apologize. I got home from my ball game (more on that in a minute) and was beat. I fell asleep almost immediately after my head hit the pillow and that hasn’t been the trend lately. I don’t know if it’s the heat or the fact that I have the smallest window in the house and therefore, the shittiest air conditioner but I’ve become accustomed to waking up at least twice during the night and praying that I instantly fall back to sleep. It doesn’t always work.

Tonight is movie night and yes, we’re going to see The Pirates of the Caribbean 2. Didn’t see the first one. I really tried but since there was no rainout last night, there was nothing I could do. I’ve actually heard this one sucks compared to the first one so maybe it’s good that I’m seeing this one first because then it won’t put a bad taste in my mouth for the third. Or maybe I’ll lose interest completely. Guess we’ll have to see. I heard the special effects are really good and I love Keira Knightley in all her emaciated glory! Ok, she’s not anorexic, just blessed with good (anorexic) genes. But seriously, I have loved her ever since Bend it Like Beckham and she graces one of my most favorite girly chicks of all time, Love Actually. What can I say? I’m a sucker for an accent. So, we’ll see how she fares in this film and if I’m not completely exhausted I’ll post a tiny review later on tonight.

New favorite song: St. Robinson in His Cadillac Dream by Counting Crows. I discovered this song on their new live album that I single handedly downloaded off Itunes. It might have one of the best lines ever in it: “I may not go to Heaven but I hope you go to Hell.” Granted, it’s probably been said a million times but I’m not sure if it’s ever been used in song. Thank you Adam Duritz, thank you. Counting Crows and the Goo Goo Dolls are coming to SPAC on August 7th so if anyone is interested in going, let me know. I rarely miss a live Counting Crows opportunity, regardless of the fact that I am irritated by the experience every time. I love singing along at concerts and Adam Duritz constantly changes the way he sings (and the words for that matter) and I know that’s part of the live experience but I just want to hear what I want to hear and sing along. Isn’t that the point? That’s why I can’t see “jam bands” like Dave Matthews because I don’t want to hear them go off for 20 minutes on a song that could have been done 17 minutes prior. I mean, they have lots of songs and if they didn’t go nuts I could hear even more of the songs I love.

O’s dropped a game to the A’s after an 87 minute rain delay last night, knocking off their three game winning streak. My cousin and her kids are down there right now so I hate to disappoint them with the loss, but I can guarantee they’re still having a great time with their upgraded seats! However, no one is going to get a Brian Roberts bobblehead until September unless they hit up the Delmarva Shore birds game. Apparently the dolls that were supposed to be given away last Saturday had skin resembling that of a Smurf. I get it, B-Rob’s not the tallest player in the pack, but a Smurf? Give the poor guy a break! Hasn’t he had enough trouble getting back to form this year and trying to lead a subpar team?

Oh shoot, I almost forgot about the ball game. Well, I struck out my first time up. Looking. I laughed all the way to the bench. The first two strikes were so bad that I couldn't believe he called the last one. Such is life. So, for some reason, the graying (not that there's anything wrong with that), middle aged (again, nothing wrong with that) shortstop came right out of the gates gunning for me. I guess when you strike out in slow pitch softball they just assume you suck. He was at first for the last out of the inning and the pitcher turned around to throw it to me at second for the last out of the inning and as this guy is running, he yelled at me. I mean, like "RAR" so I would drop the ball. What am I, 12? I caught the ball, stepped on the bag and turned to him and said "are you serious?" I mean, come on. He kind of had this defeated look on his face and murmured "no" and all I could say was "good thing." Everyone on my team said my face was absolutely priceless when this happened and I can imagine it would have been. What's really funny is that I probably have the most attitude of any of the girls on my team so I'm definitely the wrong one to screw with. I love it when they pick the wrong girl! This continues throughout the game. If a ball gets hit to me, he yells "that's trouble" and other such things. Apparently my Chuck Knoblauch reputation has preceded me. So, he's up with a girl on 1st with one out in the bottom of the 7th and is trying like hell to hit it to me cause his team was only down by 4 or so runs. He succeeds, and the ball takes a bad hop which I barehanded to get the girl out at second. He's cursing himself on first while I give him the stare down. I love that it means that much to these people that they win. I'm gonna have a beer, some dinner and go home to bed regardless of whether I win or lose. Not gonna beat myself up either way. Don't get me wrong, winning is way better, but you can't win all the time. Anyway as pathetic as it may be, it made my night to force him to go home and drown his sorrows in his Genny Cream Ale.

In other news - Pamela Anderson and Kid Rock are set to marry. I thought the party I went to this weekend had a redneck vibe but good god, this could be the biggest white trash party of the year! I guess when you’re a celebrity being apart from someone for three or four years and watching you both bang random B-listers makes you realize how important love and marriage is. Best of luck to you both but don’t make the “not getting a blood test” mistake twice, ok Pam?

Ok, enough chatting. Time to get to work. It’s hump day so enjoy it as best you can!

I have a question

Why does the soap in public bathrooms smell like Fruity Pebbles? I'm not kidding. I was in the bathroom at work today and I smelled a smelly smell. It took me a minute, but I realized that it was a smell from my childhood and that smell is Fruity Pebbles. It's a great smell, don't get me wrong, but Fruity Pebbles should not remind you of public urination.

I'm supposed to be watching the first Pirates of the Caribbean movie but I didn't get around to it. We're actually having a movie night for work and we're supposed to see the second one but it seems that everyone has already seen it (except for me because I knew it was the movie night movie so why would I see it beforehand?). So, they're thinking of switching the movie to The Devil Wears Prada which (as any of my blog readers should know) I've already seen. I don't mind going to see it again but it costs $7 to go see a movie down in Hudson and at least $11 to see it in Albany. Not to mention I don't understand the concept of seeing a movie without popcorn (what's the point) and you know it's gonna cost you $5 for a small soda. But, in the name of all that's employable, I'm sure I'll still go. It'd look bad if I backed out now, am I right? So anyway, since I didn't watch the first movie and everyone says you HAVE to see the first before the second, I almost hope they change the movie, that's my point.

Remember the post about me being an awful painter? That still holds true. I thought maybe it was a one day thing... nope! I'm bad. The bathroom color is amazing and hopefully will look good when it's done, but the first coat just looks, well, atrocious. I think it's probably because I did the edging first around the whole room and then went back and did the actual wall so, the edges look a bit darker I also think it had something to do with the fact that the roller was still a little wet. I'm not sure if that makes a difference but (to my untrained eye) it seemed like it did. There is paint all over the bathroom and all over me. Thank god it's water based and that I'm painting the floor and getting rid of the sink because they both now look like the church in Steel Magnolias. I just mean swathed in pink, not necessarily "blush" and "bashful."

I got the call today regarding an audition for a local production of the Will Rogers Follies. A friend of mine is choreographing it and she asked me if I'd audition. I'm really looking forward to doing it. She said if I wanted to audition for a singing part I was more than welcome to, but I got over that whole singing anywhere but my car and the shower in high school so I think I'll just dance! I'll keep you posted on that. The show is October 27th and they're talking about having rehearsals at least twice a week starting in August. Should be interesting. I'm wondering if I'm really able to commit to that much, only because it's still summer and ball isn't over until later on in August. Luckily, I'm a quick learner so I hope that'll help!

Oh well, time to finish my laundry and get my shit together for my ball game tomorrow. I really hope it rains because if we have to play ball in this blistering heat I might die. Ok, not literally, but it won't be a pretty sight and isn't co-ed softball all about the pretty? If you've ever seen some of the teams we play against, you would completely understand the sarcasm that statement is laced with. Congrats - your Monday is over.